Making an art out of telling on myself 😂💜

Oh look, a Cucumber

SLASH REF NOT SLASH GEN

Can their ship name be Duracell?

AND BORING

Something tells me Sarah will have a very normal reaction to this news

It is the Amirican way 🫡
/patriotic

Oh it’s totally normal now, you should def try it next time you see Amir. Post your review, it’s scientific data, very important, the world needs to know 🫡

And, as I had suspected, now that I’ve confirmed that I know what it feels like, I feel pretty confident I’ve felt others in the past and just didn’t know that’s what I was feeling 💜 3/3

My sister recently described it to me in detail, and today I just happened to be on my phone when a notification popped up about an earthquake happening near me, so I immediately planted my feet and just paid attention to how everything felt and sure enough I FINALLY FELT IT!!! 😁😁😁 2/3

Y’all I have lived in California my entire life but I had never felt an earthquake as it was happening until today 😭 It’s been a source of frustration cuz people always ask if I felt them and I never knew what to feel for, so I had never noticed one 😭 1/3

But uhhhh yeah, long story short several of us ended up asking him to spray the headshots we got with his cologne as a joke and he obliged. Mine still smells nice (yes I just checked, I am nothing if not thorough)

Lmao so the sniffing things goes waaaaaayyyyy back and has just become a running gag. Part of that was when he sold a round of headshots on Streamily specifically to raise money for the Lilith Fund (I don’t remember if it was during the fund-a-thon or separate/later in the year)

IYKYK, THAT WAS A /REF NOT JUST ME BEING CREEPY

You gonna spray it with your cologne? Asking for a fri— me. I’m asking for me.

Go home.

*narrows worldview*

Wait no that’s the bad one, don’t do that 😬

🫡

Professional whimsical skedaddler 🫶💜

The same way you once reposted a post from “Nigelstor wants to slob on Feral’s knob”

I just… people don’t consider the emotional and energetic sides of providing massage. It’s intimate, and intimacy takes energy. I am putting my hands all over your body, consistently, for 50-80-110 minutes at a time. Do you think maybe that deserves a decent motherfucking tip??

PSA from a pissed off CMT

FIVE DOLLARS ON A NINETY DOLLAR SERVICE IS NOT A TIP IT’S AN INSULT

(And this is someone who rebooked with me and tipped the same last time so don’t come for me, it’s not a skill issue on my part)

The President of the United States of America is a terrorist.

I’m calling it guys. Fancy Santa fanfic.

Yeah I learned the hard way that it cuts off the rest of the comment as soon as you use an emoji. There was supposed to be a little happy April fools message with my “flames on the wheeliechair of fortune movie poster” dono but all you got was the first bit 😅

🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞

What a l lovely dream, I’m jelly as fuck tbh

It’s extra irksome cuz even if they were going for trinity like the holy trinity, they literally chose 2 demons and the princess of hell

Me too, omg so much fun 😁💜