This brewery tour looks like it’s going to be great fun, apart from the fact that every other person on the tour looks like the kind of person who’d do a brewery tour on a Wednesday afternoon.

Except go to bed early or any nerd shit like that.

I would do literally ANYTHING to not be just completely exhausted for 12 consecutive hours.

I’ll give no context but my father has just said to me ‘if it weren’t for Bernie Clifton I’d have killed myself or someone else’

The 18th Century British Navy would be so pissed off at you all acting like life giving you lemons was a bad thing.

Good

Is she not currently

Imagine a TV show with Stephen Graham and Tom Hollander. Could be about anything and would be the greatest TV show ever. Stephen Graham and Tom Hollander in: ‘Posting a couple of letters and popping to Aldi’ runs for 10 series and wins every BAFTA and Emmy all 10 years. A modern masterpiece.

Rick I’m at it like a bag of cocaine in 2007. Voraciously and unstoppable

I’d change my name

Sure the whole thing is weird but the main takeaway for me is how basic Stormzy’s McDonalds order is.

Maga lads hate it when you deadname the Gulf of America. Which is a lovely irony.

I own (a gift) an AI written paella recipe book. Funniest thing I’ve ever read

Written a kids tv show that will teach colonialism and Spanish.

Conquista-Dora the Explorer

The Northern Irish lad who works at the coffee shop on Brighton Station concourse is very simply the nicest man in the world.

I truly think the best version of me is the optimistic idiot who prepares overnight oats before bed every night. He’s way better than the bacon sandwich coveting goblin that wakes up every morning.

Everytime they interview someone mega old they always say their secret is something like ‘4 fags a day, 9 raw eggs at 3am and never forgiving a grudge’.

I’ll be completely honest, I reckon it’d take more than one rodeo for me to be totally au fait with it.

emember my mum that was annoyed that the Gavin and Stacey finale didn’t end in a, and I use her words here, fatal bus crash?

Well she’s just told me that she wasn’t overly keen on the film Wonka as she felt it was too skewed towards appealing to children.

The film based on the children’s book.

Few years back. Whole new direction

Oh mate do I have some news for you regarding Ian Watkins. Who, previously was the lead singer of that band and now, well, he’s diversified.

What is Biff Tannen’s favourite:

1: Filler word

2: Greeting

3: 2000’s rockish boy band?

I’ve never seen a single Three Musketeers adaptation where any of them even goes near a fucking musket.

I think we really overlook the fact that in episode 2 of Gavin and Stacey the armed police response unit point 3 assault rifles at Gavins head and it’s just never mentioned again.

Rule at every British funeral. One person has to turn up in a fleece and those trainers that are for hiking.

So they deserve to die??!! You’ve changed

Well don’t tweet about it!! Warn the passengers.

My 2 year old woke up at 5 and refused to go back to bed. She’s now demanding everyone play ‘pretend nap’ and I’ve never been angrier.

Adults in the UK reach 60 and then swap their tv remote for a collection of Rube Goldberg boxes that simultaneously are all necessary and yet also absolutely
useless.

I would happily advertise PomBear for 0 pounds. In fact I will.

Pombears. Fantastic. Best crisp out there. But some.