yr being dramatic yr honour 🙄

you were right

Everybody has that one barely audible homie that you forget is standing in the room with you while you're scrying the orb and now he's seen too much

it’s SUMMER! and yet ?

i’m sort of surprised that so many people universally seem to be having a very bad time rn

🫂

just try competing with me

susceptible to sinister well laid plans bf, greedy for gems gf

Holding a customer’s $1 bill up to the light and looking really close for three full minutes

pine nuts: but a fraction of the forest’s wealth

it sort of rocked ?

doing barbie oppenheimer with severe chronic pain was like being put in a torture chamber that contains margot robbie

Setting aside petty grievances to focus on serious grudges

my xanax bottle is literally enchanted and only opens when i actually need one

i’ve been sleeping so deeply lately and having intense dreams what’s up with that

felt very insincere . boom

i’m going to not like barbie but i’m going to be the only person online who is right about why

[watching birds at the feeder] i could do that

meeeeeeeee😍

i know this is so unfortunate i’m waiting for everyone who was really excited about the movie to see it before i point this out because it genuinely spoils the only major plot twists

my shitpost being gerwig’s actual vision >

posted a tweet about barbie movie that was a joke that i obviously thought was pretty safely not what it’s about and it was 100% the exact plot lmao

Playing flute in my dismal ass maze

life is short and i’m sort of dumb honestly i’ve come to terms with both things

chiquita should breed a banana that produces an inedible, pearlescent fruit that could be used as a gem

my friend was really drunk and crying heavily last night and me and our friends were sitting with her and she goes “we want to be bad girls …..but we’re just SO GOOD” and went right back to crying

trying and failing to find a bit of perverse enjoyment in the humiliating experience of everyday life