We're friends, now! 😂

I look forward to pouring concrete down the air vents of his bunker... 🙄

Instead of saying I have to poop, I say I’m starting a movement.

Wife of Former Microsoft CEO Gifts NPR One of Its Biggest Donations in History Connie Ballmer, philanthropist and wife of former Microsoft CEO, donated $80 million to National Public Radio

NPR received $113 million in donations after losing federal funding, including $80 million from Connie Ballmer, wife of former Microsoft CEO, Steve Ballmer

"I support NPR because an informed public is the bedrock of our society, & democracy requires strong, independent journalism”

#SheShed

My lawyer wouldn't allow me to add a clause requiring my friends to spend a night in a haunted massion in order to get inheritance.

What a loser! Didn't he watch cartoons growing up!?!? 😕

I'm sorry, but Iran's Lego portrayal of Kash Patel is just fucking killing me!

I'm sorry, but Iran's Lego portrayal of Kash Patel is just fucking killing me! 🤣

Hear me out... Sticky Notes, but... like... they're not sticky! 🙄

There was no descent into madness. I did a cannonball.

This is very good

The National Science Foundation which funds a quarter of all basic scientific research in the country is being dismantled.

I know, right!?!? The first year, it was a couple days before my birthday, and I was throwing a dinner party and doing a lot of cooking. I needed to wear rubber gloves the entire evening. It was super embarrassing and frustrating!

CERTIORARI -- SUMMARY DISPOSITION 24-1099 SMITH, KYLE, ET AL. V. SCOTT, ROCHELLE, ET AL. The petition for a writ of certiorari is granted. The judgment is vacated, and the case is remanded to the United States Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit for further consideration in light of Zorn v. Linton, 607 U. S. ___ (2026) (per curiam). Justice Sotomayor, Justice Kagan, and Justice Jackson would deny the petition for a writ of certiorari.

By a 6–3 vote, and with no opinion, the Supreme Court throws out a lower court decision denying qualified immunity who killed an unarmed, mentally ill man by using "bodyweight force" to restrain him. All three liberals dissent. www.supremecourt.gov/orders/court...

I'm supposed to believe that our government needs billions of dollars to "protect us from terrorists", when they can't stop randos from calling me to see if I want my roof inspected!?!? 😡

Two years in a row, within a few days of my birthday, I tripped on an uneven sidewalk in the same neighborhood and fell down.

Both times, my hands and knees were all scrapped up and it took about 6 weeks for the wounds to heal!

I'm now VERY superstitious when I walk in that neighborhood! 😊

@PleaseBeGneiss - jeff bezos: i don’t like it when people say i look like an alien therapist: well you did exploit earth’s resources bezos: so that i can build my spaceship therapist: bezos: *licks eyeball*

@pleasebegneiss.bsky.social

Prude. 😂

Sir, perhaps you'd enjoy an extensive tour of our crypts?

There's nothing worse than when you write a Unit Test that you think is practically useless and it actually finds an error. 🙄

The worst possible tactic you can use when negotiating a deal with a regime like Iran is to dunk on them in public during negotiations. Any knowledgeable seasoned diplomat knows this. But we have Mr. Art of the Deal who needs to feed his cult and the markets a steady diet of BS.

A headline reads: "Times Exclusive: The Inside Story of 5 Days That Remade the Supreme Court. Secret memos obtained by The New York Times illuminate the origins of the court’s now-routine 'shadow docket' rulings on presidential power."

Confidential memos by Supreme Court justices, obtained by The New York Times, show how they decided to bypass time-tested procedures and create the modern “shadow docket,” a rushed and secretive new way of doing business. www.nytimes.com/2026/04/18/u...

Read the Supreme Court’s Shadow Papers Read 16 pages of internal deliberations from the Supreme Court that the New York Times has obtained, bringing the origins of the court’s “shadow docket” into the light.

All 16 pages of confidential memos were expected to remain secret for decades to come, but The New York Times has published them. See the documents here.

A budget is a declaration of priorities. Trump has made clear that you and your family aren't one of his.

Hugh Jackman? 😕

Happy Friday. Fuck Trump and every person who voted for him!

Dewlap Fridays

Time to sharpen my pitchfork... 🙄

This is not a just war.
This is not a just war.
This is not a just war.
This is not a just war.
This is not a just war.
This is not a just war.
This is not a just war.
This is not a just war.
This is not a just war.
This is not a just war.

This is just war.

Do Snakes on a Plane next, Pete