timeline’s telling me it’s not going well, I’m choosing peace 🙂‍↕️

the alternative is watching the match so really this is much better and I’m having a great time

on a tour through the scottish highlands and the guide has made no less than 7 taylor swift references. we still have several hours to go.

New Carli Lloyd mail beef just dropped

I thought jet lag was kicking my ass more than usual and then I realized I’ve only slept maybe 7 hours in the last 56 hours lol

lmaooo y’all are too funny

olise, omg, that was mean (complimentary)

draaamaaaa in bayern 🫢

bayern-madrid is on drugs lmao

neuer… 😬

we had to hunker down last night too. thank goodness we have a finished basement

man we just came back upstairs from the basement like 30 min ago after one tornado warning ended and now they’ve issued another one. back down we go.

can’t watch jeopardy bc there are severe storms and cbs is only showing us the tornado and hail radar 😔

studs to the face followed by face smacking the ground RIP 😵‍💫

A digital screenshot of a news article from "The Independent" website, dated April 13, 2026. The headline reads: "Trump gets McDonalds DoorDashed to White House and then takes Iran war questions with delivery person." Below the headline, the subheader states: "Trump grabs two bags of McDonald’s before issuing threats to Iran over nuclear program." The article features a video still showing Donald Trump standing outdoors in front of a white building, wearing a dark suit and purple tie. Next to him stands a woman wearing a red t-shirt that says "DOORDASH GRANDMA." The video player includes a title overlay that reads: "Trump claims offensive Jesus meme was him 'as a doctor' healing the sick."

Not the onion.

sorry *WEAK all caps

i’m still laughing at “pope leo is weak on crime”

delighted that the greater sports world has been introduced to priscila chinchilla, and eagerly await the discoveries of atlanta primus, gift monday, and skye bacon

do I go to my sister’s orchestra concert next saturday or do I extend my london trip so I can go to the arsenal-lyon first leg and cheer on marathoners that weekend instead?

This is going to go triple platinum in a long LinkedIn post

i was glued to the broadcast every day of that mission and all i saw and heard were human scientists, human engineers, human curiosity, human determination, and human collaboration between multiple nations. what i didn’t hear was AI.

they look like prisoners from afar, with their orange suits and wobbly legs 😂

And that's four.

the sun glare kills me every time

not the camera guys going behind the capsule right when they come out 😭

you think they did rock, paper, scissors to determine who gets out first?

what do you think the integrity crew is talking about in there while they’re waiting?

it’s kind of hilarious they’re having the most radio troubles now and not 250,000 miles away

yes

That was some of the most remarkable live television I've seen. Shoutouts to the iconic narrating man, to the woman chiming in with the confirmation checks, to the astronauts, to the cheering room, to humanity