These are the only two salts you need

Nobody will ever convince me that those plastic disposable salt grinders are anything but a scam

Protecting my peace by filing an extension on my tax returns

Reviewing influencer looks from Coachella 🌼

My main issue with the Paul brothers is that both of their hair looks like shit. Once they figure that out I’ll make further judgements

Life without being forced to learn equations

Sometimes I feel extremely stressed and then I remember that I’ll never have to take college algebra again and I realize that everything’s going to be okay

“Actually, to me, the First Lady of France is a far more beautiful woman than Candace, in fact, it's not even close!” Girlll lmfaooooo😭😭

Trump just posted his conservative commentator burn book on main 😭

This is the foreign policy equivalent of a parent saying “I’m going to count to three” when they want you to do something

Happy easter I’m laying my egg

Teasing war plans like it’s a Taylor Swift album release

And also dropping real bombs

Our great Christian president is praising Allah and dropping the F-bomb on Easter

People who honk at you to hurry up while making a stressful unprotected left turn onto a highway are all dangerous sociopaths who deserve to be exiled from the society I think

If Trump wants $1.5 trillion for the military could I at least have a little bit of that just to buy a switch 2 so I can play pokopia

holy shit you can literally see the northern lights

You’ve just created one million Kristi Noem’s husbands

Dems wonder why Gen Z is disillusioned from politics and will do anything except acknowledge that they completely fucked over Bernie in 2016 and shattered any semblance of hope we had for this country as children

Sometimes I feel okay and then I learn facts like oh during prehistoric times it fucking rained nonstop for a million years straight. Like oh okay

I know feminism is still necessary because I’ve never had a Reddit snark page made about me and every single other female creater with my same size of audience has and they’re ruthless

Being an american vibes

Me: on the verge of a mental breakdown
The steamboat: Hey now! (Hey now!) IKO IKO AN DAY!

I love living in the French Quarter because I could be having the worst day of my life and then suddenly the calliope on the steamboat will start playing a full on concert like it’s my own personal annoying soundtrack

I can’t believe we’re going to the moon and not even taking Katy Perry this time

Living in New Orleans is insane because what do you mean it’s the time of year where I have to watch out for the giant venomous caterpillars raining down from the sky

April fools day is really difficult to navigate when everything is already so unbelievably stupid

unironically miss rachel for president

when someone calls it chat gbt im like humanity is doomed

Reviewing the Tr*mp store spring collection 🐰🌷