Flavor Flavonoids was his father

Nice 😂

im proud of you champ

That’s gonna leave a question mark.

well my gramma overdosed on weed and died but sure, go ahead and dance on her grave with your bongs and your vapes or whatever

don’t invite me to your party unless you have a mystery for me to solve

Give me a hit of that high fructose corn syrup.

Flavor Flav is short for Flavorful Riboflavin

I'm going to dissociate, does anyone need anything?

healing my inner torment by incorporating one bandaid a day into my diet

if you love it so much why don’t you marry juana

why not three testicles tho, maybe i wanna juggle while i’m down there doing mouth stuff

im dissecting your humor
im putting your lol under
a microscope and finding
out exactly how it works
its not even funny how ill
understand your comedy

(puts a band-aid on your post) I hope it gets better soon

it’s called “being cheeky” because you’re being a bit of an ass

My favorite part of Star Wars was when Ripley would give a hysterical guy the Vulcan pinch thingy

normalize dropping to your knees and sobbing when people won’t stop talking

“euthanasia for one, please” -me, at the doctor’s office

4/20 called. It just wanted to say “high.”

cut my life into pieces please and thank you

I hope I'm smarter than usual today

Your honor, I'd like to use the "I know you are but what am I" defense

420 on a Monday, proof we're in the worst possible timeline.

i’m gonna smoke weed and operate heavy machinery today

i’m such a tradwife that i can’t climax unless i’m fantasizing about churning butter

are you telling me this scallion can rap

You use too many words. Calm down.

sure, she’s younger and prettier than me but does she pee when she sneezes like i do?

Not now babe, I'm sorting my pills for the week

id love to relax but my brain
just keeps opening more tabs