Eight hour days
Five times a week
But only
Two day weekends
And
One hour for lunch
Some bullshit right there

[Walking into the bank]

I see debt people

Wow.

Gonna have to re-post this.

I hope you're happy...

Someone keeps sneaking up and smearing grease all over my glasses. I wish I knew who it was

Hi. I had to log in to get on the old blooski tonight.
So I think I know a little something about adversity...

Vintage comicbook panel, showing a woman in a nurse's uniform gripping cell bars. Top: "She, too, is in a cage ..." Notice on cage: "Wild human Female. Very rare. Do not annoy."

Monday Mood

Existential dread repeated over and over

Today's tshirt

Guys, guys, guys. JFC, everything sucks.

Call them the Sunday Scaries. I call them the Sunday Blahs. Whatever the case, they're kicking my ass today.

Remember when Whimsymaxx opened for Slayer? 🤘🏼

I must be the exception. Ugly af, but zero power!
Dammit.

Sign on the side of the road - "We're widening the Turnpike!"

My ass is widening by the day. You don't see me putting up billboards about it.

I'm full. I ate too much. I'm probably dying. Peace. Back later.

Animals that can climb steep mountainsides are lowkey goated

Did you know that at the WEF it was discussed that the wealthy will travel the world while you view it on a VR headset? A manipulated image devoid of human experience & interaction. Isolation is the hallmark of abuse & control. You don’t have community you have a smartphone. Get off the couch. Riot.

I'm already tired of the weed jokes on Monday.

...and yes I know exactly what would probably help with my grumpiness.

awkwardly somewhere being awkward

Advice I saw on the internet today:

*Blooski opens up like it's supposed to.

I have no new notifications.*

Yep, blooski's back to normal, baby!

Dude that's not how you say detritus

Pulled a muscle on the exercise bike and dropped all three of my hot dogs

Is the old blooski having a hard time making it through the day? Seems like we all are, eh? *sighs in old man*

I admitted to you that I've been living with arrested development since I was a teenager.
Please respond.

When a sperm whale was asked to confirm this, he first lied, then when pressed, blamed it on someone else.

I’m not sure why I’m getting such a kick out of this, but on my walk this morning, my foot slid on something laying on the sidewalk. Looking down, angry and expecting to see a pile of dog crap, I found, much to my delight, that for the first time in my life, I’d actually slipped on a banana peel.

Please keep this mind if considering approaching me, as well.

Close enough!

Should be part of his next test.

how dare you be in a good mood

It's both hilarious and frustrating af that my uber-religious family voted for the antichrist. JFC.
If there was a White Jesus, he'd be rolling over in his cave.

(see what I did there?)