I just want to give someone money and watch cars go vroom why is this all so complicated

Excerpt of a job posting: "...This position is considered part-time and therefore is not benefits eligible. Salary Range:: $35,000 USD - $40,000 USD Why Should You Apply? Benefits: Outstanding benefits package, including 401k match and generous PTO plan"

every job post be like

crowdfunding 20 dollars so I can afford to run the air conditioner for one night

if i never post again just assume i died to meatball overdose

I think I'm going to cut this in half

several times

Same as the last post but now baked, with bubbling cheese over the meatballs

Half of the loaf assembled into a sub. It takes up an entire large dinner plate.

I significantly overestimated the capacity of my oven. This is only half of the meatballs.

meatball subs on hold for now until it's not 90 degrees in my kitchen

two whole loaves of italian bread and nearly 2 pounds of ground beef, in original packaging, sitting on a baking sheet on top of the stove

I am about to make the greatest meatball subs of all time

a bowl of fettuccini alfredo with tomatoes, spinach, mushrooms, and feta

for a "what the fuck am I going to cook because I woke up at 7pm" meal this came out pretty good

[2 weeks unemployed] what the fuck do retired people do all day

the Stash is what it is

starting to think the o's didn't actually fix anything this offseason

masn having preroll ads for the live game sure is a thing

if you miss the first 3 minutes of a game you get to miss two more minutes for free

last time i was homeless i didn't have any furniture to worry about but now i have 8 years of stuff to try to figure out what to do with and it's just making this whole process 10 times worse

how do you get one of those paypal links where people can send you money

i'm in deep shit if I don't get some money asap

magic is real

the problem is humans are born with all the mana they're ever going to have, and babies waste it all on useless spells like googoo and gaga

how can anyone do unemployment fraud when the website completely breaks if you press enter instead of clicking the next button

my phone continues to not believe anyone could be an orioles fan and keeps suggesting me articles about the twins losing

my computer is so edgy

doing some disk cleanup since everything broke when C: filled up

there are 7 copies of edge in program files

that's not even the worst of it

there are 10 more copies in temporary installer files

dreaming about the infinitely long home depot again

no matter where you enter, whatever you came in for is always on the other side of the store

more.gif but it's me putting dill on the pasta salad

I don't think most recipes measure dill in cups

i wish pills didn't have to be so round

there's probably $100 of pills behind my kitchen counter

One thing I do have is milk so in my head I started putting together some kind of milk and butter based dressing and then realized I was just making mashed potatoes

Looking up substitutes for mayo in potato salad but they're all things I also don't have in the fridge

[Person shaking head] breakfast in bed

[Person nodding enthusiastically] breakfast in bath

not related specifically to any particular news from this week but also somehow related to all of it:

maybe we should just not name things after people

Photo of a car odometer showing 122223 miles and a trip of 222.9

I was so close

tried to make ranch dressing mix with 2% milk instead of cream like instructed...basically ended up with a ranch milkshake