Semen demon!

Somehow movies about the future didn’t predict we’d have a president who wears a baseball cap all the time.

I'm not anti-billionaire, I just want to cut their waste, fraud and abuse.

TRUMP: I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT REOPENING ALCATRAZ. SOMETIMES I JUST SAY STUFF! THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER!

Trump wearing a tux to go see the Les Mis tour is so funny

His wife is afraid of him.

All my AI friends think I’m awesome and my ideas are great.

But I just opened a new factory!!!!

I didn’t expect to get emotional at a vampire movie. SINNERS is great. It’s complex and thought-provoking and funny. If you want Hollywood to make more movies that aren’t pre-existing IP or reboots, go see it this weekend!

But I just opened a new factory!!!!

"The thing about explorers is: they discover things that are already there."

RIP William Finn. Your work means a lot to me.

Boy all this talk of "temporary suffering" so we can usher in some vaguely defined "Golden Age" sure sounds like a cult leader right before he tells everyone to put on their Nikes for the last time.

You can't see it but he's sitting on a beanbag chair.

If Democrats would stop doing what they’re doing and do a magical unnamed perfect thing instead then Trump would fall in the cake I just know it.

The same CEOs who destroyed the Hollywood system (that made everyone in it ridiculously rich for 100 years) so they could chase “innovation” and higher stock prices are now chasing “Trump” - and it all feels so needlessly stupid and sad.

BREAKING: The White House is banning the Washington Post from all press events until Amazon agrees to make Trump the new 007.

BREAKING: Trump just signed an executive order saying we have to call them “skits.”

I think some of the same people are in both of these pictures.

Aww sweetjenifer

I miss Tumblr.

This was a wonderful way to spend 7 minutes.

Fully agree! Also, so many "news" headlines are about bad things that "could" happen. Literal fantasies about more possible negative things. Who is that helping?

I truly think Newsom should make a speech inviting Trump to personally turn on his magical water spigot during halftime of the Super Bowl.

"We don't know where it is, but if Trump tells us where to be, CA will pay for the production costs to film this historical moment."

Turns out reelecting the most easily manipulated man in history as president leads to a lot of dumb shit.

Just saw an acquaintance at the airport and like the dumbest person on planet Earth I said— “Traveling somewhere?”

“And it should be fun. In work and in life, we're all supposed to get along. We're supposed to have so much fun, like puppy dogs with our tails wagging. It's supposed to be great living; it's supposed to be fantastic.”

Koalas are more like pigs than we want to deal with.

I fuckin love LA so much.

I know a lot of people like to hate on the city, but I don’t give a shit?LA rules.

At its core, Los Angeles is a proud blue-collar city with people from all walks of life. Then the creative black sheep from every family comes here to create together.