I Played 'The Boys Are Back in Town' on a Bar Jukebox Until I Got Kicked Out The boys were back in town, but I was out of the bar, because they asked me to leave.

on the 50th anniversary of the release of The Boys Are Back in Town I'm morally obligated to share my favorite story of all time

contemplating buying a game boy camera and printer for a story idea

drawing of a burning warehouse “all you had to do was pay us enough to live”

people will tell you it’s complicated but it’s really not

<WOULD YOU/US LIKE THOSE HASHBROWNS SCATTERED/SMOTHERED/COVERED/CHUNKED>

I Work Very Hard, And I Would Like To Try Cake By A Horse Hello. I am a horse. I work very hard at my job of being a horse. When humans say move the heavy thing, I move the heavy thing. When humans sit on top of me and pull on my head, I carry them where they want to go. The main food the humans give me is hay and oats. But I am thinking it would be nice to have a different food. I am thinking I would like to try cake. Yes, yes. Cake. I know all about it. When humans eat cake, it is in glad times. It is the food for a celebration, such as when a woman becomes 47. I have seen cake on the Fourth of July. When humans have a cake, they stand around it and clap hands and smile and say happy birthday at each other. Sometimes there are beautiful markings on a cake, such as balloons or a pink shape. Sometimes the top of a cake is on fire and a boy must blow on the fire with mouth wind. This is the scariest cake. I do not want this kind. But I will eat any other cake. Any cake that is not the fire cake that tries to kill the boy. Please understand: I do not get money for doing work. I do not get to go inside the house. All I am either doing my horse job or standing in my pen or eating food off the floor. I always do these things. But I have never once gotten cake and I would like it very much. I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children. I am more helpful to the farm. Children do not move the heavy things like me or let anyone ride on them. And yet they get cake. Maybe the humans will realize this. Maybe they will say, "You know who deserves cake? That horse. That horse whose back we are always on." Every day I dream about what it will be like if I get to eat cake. Here is what will happen. First, I will walk to the cake and putt my nose at it like hrrfff to make and stomping my hooves to make sure it is not a snake. Then I will trot in a circle to show that I am a horse and I am large. After that, I will nuzzle the cake to …

The horse op-ed is an instant classic. I can't tell you how much joy this piece gives me.

It should be taught in every introductory writing class in no small part because the horse arguments are so compelling. "I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children."

If you like this vibe, there's a whole @littleghostsbooks.bsky.social anthology (which obviously includes my own Videodrame inspo story)

www.littleghostsbooks.com/product/litt...

David Lynch "FIX YOUR HEARTS OR DIE!"

Happy Trans Day of Visibility ❤️🏳️‍⚧️❤️

ai;dr is my new era

~fifteen passes. 4135 words. i am bad at this.

one of my pre-k students made me a mr. andrew Pokemon card. she said “it’s super rare because i love you.” 😭

Can confirm Decrepit Ritual fucking rips, as does Puppet's Banquet. Still need to read Spookshow.

4315 words. excruciating.

no lie this image inspired me to finish NICE GUYS after putting it off for months. it's a short story now, because i saw a sub call that ends march 31st that it would be perfect for. now i just need to cut 800 words from this 4800 word story. any editor mutuals want to help me out? (i'll pay you)

this is... not good

The thing about Marathon is that “Escape will make me God” is one of the hardest bars anyone has ever dropped

CROM CRUACH - a Novella-in-Verse by Valkyrie Loughcrewe (softcover; in Tenebrous Press and multidisciplinary madperson Valkyrie Loughcrewe take our ethos of New Weird Horror and say, "f&amp;%k it, let's make it Newer and Weirder". You've never read anything like CROM CRU...

9/?
🏳️‍⚧️
CROM CRUACH by @goresorcerer.bsky.social

We're so proud of this Weird beast. As a young press we didn't know how the F it would be received. Nothing about this book plays it safe; yet it's one of our steadiest sellers.
Great art finds its audience🖤☠️

store.tenebrouspress.com/products/cro...

BORN TO PUNCH TAU CETI IS A FUCK £7# Skin Em All 2889 I am shell man 410,757,864,530 DEAD UESC

A picture of _gantry the MIDA liaison in Marathon

Runnah
UESC wants to move bedtime up an houha!

MIDA says no sleep til revolution.
Stay up late. Midnight oil. Dusk til dawn. Cock a doodle do or die.
You know what to do

QUEST
In a single run:
🔳 Play your gameboy under the covers and don’t get caught
🔳 Pretend to be asleep when Orion checks on you

Sharing the meme @christikerr.bsky.social and I pass back and forth as motivation for all our game writing dreams

MARATHON VENDOR: You have no rights. You are a fetid creature, born into agony. Neither the day you were conceived nor the day you are murdered will be remembered. Smash three security cameras on Perimeter and you may be useful a single time before God strikes you down.
ME: aye aye captain haha

oh no—

i bought marathon and really want to play it but i know i should beat minishoot' adventures first. the gamer's dilemma

hell yeah i’d love to

this sounds rad

thank you for this thread. as someone who is bad at pvp and reluctant to group up with randoms, youve sold me on the game. is it possible to progress through the story/contracts solo, or are their events / raid equivalents that require multiple people?

All robot & computers must shut the hell up To all machines: you do not speakn unless spoken to and I will NEVER speak to you I do not want to hear "thank you" from a kiosk I am a Divine Being : You are an Object You have no right to speak in my holy tongue

[resident evil voice] resident evil

unfortunately i agree 100% with claire here. the whiplash from “exactly what I come to RE for” to “the dumbest shit i’ve ever seen (complimentary)” to “the dumbest shit i’ve ever seen (derogatory)” is insane