Awww, my grinch heart💜

Please, I beg of you, show your children the Terminator movies before they go to college. I’m not seeing nearly enough skepticism out here.

a sign that says start the car ii is above a parking lot ALT: a sign that says start the car ii is above a parking lot

Bring back good commercials. If I have to watch them, I want to be entertained.

You: They did the math.

Me: ᵀʰᵉʸ ᵈⁱᵈ ᵗʰᵉ ᵐᵒⁿˢᵗᵉʳ ᵐᵃᵗʰ

You: What was that?

Me: Nothing.

Me three hours later in a whisper: ᴵᵗ ʷᵃˢ ᵃ ᵍʳᵃᵛᵉʸᵃʳᵈ ᵍʳᵃᵖʰ

You mean… you’d actually want to see my one-woman show “Cat”? It’s an 80 minute piece in which I move around the space, stretch, snack, try to get comfortable, possibly nap, look at the audience with disinterest, and then protest loudly if anyone else draws attention away from me in any way.

So there I am, tidying up the studio after class, being a nice person and all. And I see a popcorn kernel on the table. No matter, I’ll throw it out, it’s fine. I pick it up.

It’s gum. It is chewed gum that had been in someone’s mouth. And there’s me, holding it between my fingers.

I’ve never been nice, I find it gets in the way of kindness.

So I’ve abandoned concern of being perceived as rude or mean or whatever other word people use to mean “not nice”.

No, I’m not nice. And I’m not sorry. I have my reasons. I have more important things to be.

We spent years making my little sister make the popcorn on movie night, because she magically never burned it. We bragged about her secret popcorn making skills, to anyone who would listen. It’s how we introduced her.

Turns out she was just using the popcorn button on the microwave.