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I Played 'The Boys Are Back in Town' on a Bar Jukebox Until I Got Kicked Out The boys were back in town, but I was out of the bar, because they asked me to leave.

on the 50th anniversary of the release of The Boys Are Back in Town I'm morally obligated to share my favorite story of all time

arkansas fan about to say "I think I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes"

hawgs

What if in 20 years an actor named LeBron B. James comes along and people spend weeks arguing about whether him or Michael B. Jordan made better films

getting serious replies to my Travis Kelce jokes so here are the facts of the case:

has Kelce's play dropped off: yes

is Kelce good enough to keep playing in the NFL: also yes

should Kelce keep playing football after the world's wealthiest, most popular musician wrote a song about his penis: no

Super Bowl commercials have lost the juice

We’re gonna win they’re gonna lose

Remember when all the ads were by beer, chip, and soda companies and not techbro bullshit?

A reminder that Bad Bunny performs in front of the biggest audience on earth in seven days

Ice out

I think this is more distracting for the viewer than not being able to see the yard markers on the field. Also, if you’re gonna do this, make it gray or black

These are ideal conditions for football

Technology has gone too far

Abolish ICE and prosecute everyone who stays in it from this day forward as members of a criminal conspiracy to commit murder.

Quite simply the greatest heat check of all time

we’re in the vet’s office waiting room and they just called for Agamemnon. we all looked at the Great Dane but it turns out Agamemnon is an orange kitten in a backpack that makes him look like an astronaut cheese puff

This play won my fantasy championship. Bijan is that dude

Greatest 2 point conversion in NFL history, the old backwards pass fumble recovered in the end zone

First outright conference title since:

1945 - Indiana
1955 - Texas Tech
1962 - Duke

I am challenging The Grinch to a debate

A tie is a disgrace to the sport of football

right wingers are going to be so performatively mad about this, they might be performatively madder about this than all the things they've ever been performatively mad about combined

I can’t wait for right wingers to pretend to have a take about Bad Bunny, who they definitely never heard of before this announcement

Not to continue to do this Cassandra bullshit, but here is a clip from two years ago that outlines exactly the playbook in this moment: a government and private law enforcement army run entirely on grievance, culture war slop, and weaponizable data points, deployed against boogeymen, absent facts.

Jerry Jones will never see the pearly gates

“awful people don’t deserve to be killed, but they don’t deserve to be praised, either” is apparently a thought too complex for the pundit mind

Charlie Kirk spent his life‘s work and all of his energy and time targeting out-groups while arguing for a world in which gun massacres would be easy to enact, plentiful, and inevitable, and he became famous and wealthy doing it, and we’re now not supposed to mention that because it’s not polite.

These are all people who wanted to kill their enemies before Charlie Kirk was shot, are more vocal about it now, and will keep lusting for it long after Charlie Kirk has been buried. Today’s biggest event could have been a dog farting and they would have reacted by wanting you dead.

Losing my goddamned mind.

We can condemn political violence without valorizing a destructive, hateful bigot.

Let’s make one thing clear from the start: Charlie Kirk was the victim of a shooting in a country where he, along with other right-wing extremist influencers, have been inciting violence for years. — Kirk is neither a martyr nor a hero, he is a cause.