That's plans for the day sorted, ta

This must be what disassociation feels like

The cascade of catastrophes has reached a point where I can't even be distressed, I can only marvel at the absurdity of existence

Holy fuck the hits literally do not stop coming. If I could just finally, fully, lose my mind that would be great because I would really appreciate the vacation

If Taylor Swift or the booktok girlies could suddenly hop on over to team murder pie, my emergency vet bills would really appreciate it 🫠

If I tried to include the current amount of fuckery that is my life right now in a book, my agent would be like nope, this is unrealistic. Pick 3. At most.

2024 is already gunning for 2023's Worst Year Ever championship belt

Let's kill shitty cops. With pie.

www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/738367...

A stack of ARCs for the 3rd Pies Before Guys book

Book mail day!

Every time my life hits a certain level of suck, my brain tries to convince me that only thing that will fix it is another degree.
As if student loans aren't actively contributing to the suckfest in the first place. 🤦🏻‍♀️

The day I made my therapist laugh so hard he had to excuse himself from the room was the closest I'll ever come to winning therapy

I have three Skittles, some paper clips and rage. I think that's the same thing?

Thank gods. This is so much better than my current life plan.

George Santos having a cranky baby tantrum

BUNNIES! BUNNIES!! IT MUST BE BUNNIES!!!

Annual reminder to egg wash your pies!!

💜💜💜

A 1.99 promo graphic featuring the cover of Magic, Lies, and Deadly Pies

Murder pies are cheap today!!
www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B09C...

And yes, obviously the world is burning and there are bigger concerns, but we also live in capitalist hell where we still need to think about paying bills so....

It's wild how many books I assume are just lucky enough to be properly marketed by publishers are actually being pushed by PR firms independently hired by the author. How are lower income authors supposed to compete with this???

American healthcare: trying to figure out the exact right combination of words to describe the very bizarre sensation that's been setting up shop in your body so Google can tell you if it's worth the cost of getting it properly looked at

As long it's not a train, both of those light options are good. Thanks for doing this!

That... is wildly relevant. 💜

Yes please!

Pretty sure that's what's commonly referred to as justifiable homicide

It's MA and I'm pretty sure the state only requires the high schools to have a full time librarian. Middle and elementary can skate with part time or, it seems, none at all.

Not comfortably, as I was recently hired there (non-library role, v mixed feelings about it!)

If I end up staying, I'm going to volunteer to at least genrefy the collection so the kids who want to read can have half a chance of finding something they'll like

My whole brain melted when I realized

I was literally at a loss for words. It's the most unusable, uninviting system I could imagine.

I don't know if #library Twitter has landed here yet, but I stood in a middle school library today that was organized exclusively by... lexile. And apparently they 'don't need' a librarian because there's already a guidance counselor overseeing it 🫠