If i had a pussy id do some crazy ass shit with it. It would look like a creepypasta by the time i was 30

my review of nier

I like when i see the desmos website still favorited in my browser as if i've walked into a college classroom within the past 5 years

I decided moby dick was boring in 8th grade and stopped reading books ever since and I've felt my brain dying for years and years. Moby Dick is just that much of a monster

I say all that to say it's very hard to pursue balanced close relationships when the nature of friendships ppl are used to is so volatile. I either know what triggers ur suicidal ideation or I don't even know if u have any pets or not

Feel like this is especially common for ppl who live a decent chunk of their time around internet social spaces and online companionship. The nature of online friendship is very paradoxical in a way where its like friendships are either painfully emotionally intimate or entirely one dimensional

i hated on that pilot harder than probably anyone else when it came out because i was so excited for it and very familiar with gooseworx before it came out. But throwing it on in a discord call and going thru every episode, it pulls thru

The Amazing Digital Circus is like what hazbin hotel would be if vivziepop had a brain that developed

I was gone for so long because my state made it illegal to post to bluesky unless i gave up my social security number

u know what they say, never meet your heroes!

Looking up from my meal, locking eyes with the sandwich artist: "Thank you for making this sandwich for me. I really appreciate it."

Unfortunately i have lost the sony./vegas handle and motherfuckers will not let me have that power again but thats okay we will change and prosper in the face of adversity.

Doing hang outs and having heartfelt conversations to engagement bait for caring friendships that i'll cherish forever

Two sentence tragedy:

I should start posting here more.

- 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘩𝘴 𝘢𝘨𝘰

this is the look she gives me when she wants dinner

of course there is

babe u have to shove the sawed-off up my ass or else i cant cum

Im in minefields gooning to my hearts content, hoping my AoE (Area of Ejaculation) doesnt trip off a sensor nearby

If ur not in fear for your life every time you jack off then what the fuck is the point

penics

im not getting into cracker discourse on this app, but i will say some of y'all are way too comfy admitting ritz is ur favorite

his stand-up might be the worst garbage ive ever seen btw. U know that one high school friend who went to a party college and dropped out after 2 years bc he realized shotgunning beer wasn't a suitable stand-in for studying? Imagine him. and imagine ur unfortunate enough to run into him at a party

I've found myself caring way too much about stand-up recently and dude the landscape is so bleak. I got so far down the hole last night i put the words "bert kreischer stand up" into youtube and it was like when u sneeze in ur hands without thinking and look at it immediately after.

the government doesnt want me to create this sort of technology. Ive been getting calls ever since i released this statement

The penis just looks like a weird cell tower i think i should be able to pick up FM waves with it. I should be able to twist my balls and tune in to the local college football game using my erection if i want to.