just saw someone call Kash Patel “J Edgar Boozer” and need to lie down

uklabour Wes Streeting bringing down waiting lists like prime Modric

Ah, yes, legendary Croatian midfielder Luka Modrić. Best known, of course, for bringing down NHS waiting lists.

Inside you there are two wolves: Mr Rules and Mr Special Treats Boy.

Mark Ruffalo playing both the 10th and 14th Columbo is a nice touch.

It's giving "punishingly droll school teacher whose pupils have drawn a huge cock and balls on his back in chalk and he hasn't noticed yet"

Actually, the Shabana Mahmood "fuck right off" thing just reminds me of Emma Thompson's character in Years & Years, which is, ah, interesting

Well let's see how this strategy of telling "white liberals" to "fuck right off" works out in the local elections

Remembering the inspirational Mark Stewart (10 August 1960 – 21 April 2023)

Jim's Bar, QMU, Glasgow, circa 1997: "Ooh, you're looking like you've been skiing."
"Eh, no, I've got psoriasis."
Great conversation killers of our time.

The smell of hydrocortisone cream gives me an absolute Proustian rush, I have to say. Shame the memories it invokes aren't particularly happy ones though, eh

Just you wait, any second now he's gonna play an absolute blinder. Any time now. In the next wee bit. Just you watch. Blinders for days, blinders on toast.

I'll be honest with you, people don't like Keir on the door but it's not over this Mandelson thing. They don't like him personally

Great news boss, this Mandelson stuff isn’t cutting through on the doorstep because they already think you’re a cunt

David Cameron got that pig's head pregnant and thats where wes streeting came from

neck tat that says “hi, we’re the Mountain Goats” old-school Gotham

Should point out that you can also fit this to Vicar In a Tutu.

# It was worthwhile living a laughable life
# To set my eyes on the blistering sight
# Of Stalin with a nose ring
# He's not strange
# He just wants to live his life this way

# Stalin with a nose ring, I know, I know
# It's serious

such forensic
so leadership
blinder wow

“Mr speaker I know many members across the House will find these facts to be incredible”

House erupts with laughter

Tell you what, he's played a blinder etc, things of that nature

New poll finds most Scots actually not in favour of "clean, grrrreen nucular energeh"

[starmer voice] make no mistake, I am ABSOLUTELY INCANDESCENT, this is INEXCUSABLE and APPALLING and THE WHOLE SCHOOL WILL STAY BEHIND until the culprit steps forward

EU: The European Union will require sale of mobile phones with “user-replaceable and longer-lasting batteries” starting in 2027.

The regulation demands “availability of spare parts and manuals for 10 years to curb planned obsolescence”.

Apparently it's built on top of a rock that looks like a big wheel of cheese. Come on, guys, you can do better.

There's a Castelo do Queijo in Porto and I was very disappointed to see that it's just a fort and it's not made of cheese.

I liked the fiery ginger one. Guess it didn't catch on.

whomst could have foreseen, etc

The pizza doughballs Broke Containment overnight. I'm having the area locked down. Stay frosty.

I again note that the SNP was once a smooth, impervious sphere that Britain’s awful media outlets couldn’t crack, because everyone understood the right wing press were their enemy. And then, a bunch of middle aged crackpots got very angry about Alex Salmond being arrested for grabbing women’s arses.

The spokesperson for Sturgeon, however, makes clear there is unlikely to be any de-escalation in the war of words between two of Scottish politics’ most high-profile women. “Nicola is hugely enjoying her life since stepping down from frontline politics and hopes that in future Joanna will also find a sense of happiness,” they said. “Something which seems to be sadly lacking for her just now.”

lmao

Joanna Cherry: I've quit the SNP and I'm ashamed of them - The Times archive.ph/cxISP