Men really want to rip women for liking Taylor Swift and then take the whole weekend off to watch Wrestlemania

Personally I think I’d rather have the news broken to me for a mid-day rush of euphoria at work

When it happens would you rather be the one to break the news to someone, or have the news broken to you?

“You know what, I’m going to start blocking the strait of Hormuz even HARDER!” — the most intelligent President of all time

Windows open, thunder rolling, candles lit, mood lighting on, reading a book — genuine flow state rn

Nothing makes me feel dumber than listening to people talk about space shit

The problem remains ✨men✨

Trump supporters be like: literally everything is going wrong and all things are awful and Trump’s doing things he said he never would and nothing I voted for is actually happening lol but I still don’t regret my vote tho it’s totally fine lol no I’m not upset at all lol

Peak adulthood is getting new gutters and thinking “I can’t wait until it rains so I can go out and watch my new gutters” 😂

a woman with long blonde hair is smiling and wearing a white jacket and a pink shirt . ALT: a woman with long blonde hair is smiling and wearing a white jacket and a pink shirt .

I am watching my grass slowly turn that color that I’m going to have to mow

Don’t go getting my hopes up that Tr*mp is de*d

a woman wearing sunglasses is sitting on a plane and says help me i 'm poor . ALT: a woman wearing sunglasses is sitting on a plane and says help me i 'm poor .

I scheduled a vacation for me and my daughter and immediately after:

✔️ Garage door opener breaks
✔️ Dishwasher breaks
✔️ Need new gutters
✔️ Need fence repairs

Nobody cares that Noem’s husband wears fake tits. We care that Republicans do that shit while legislating with cruelty and demonizing others for the same things they do.

Leave me alone FREAKS

My daughter saw Vin Diesel on the iHeart awards and said “I always thought Vin Diesel was a painter from the 1800s.” Ma’am that’s van Gogh 🤣😂🤣

I mean, is anyone really ✨surprised✨ that Skattebo is dumber than a box of rocks though?

If you want a domestic suspense book that is dark, tense, foreboding and brings anxiety with every page, this book is for you. Couldn’t put it down. #BookSky 📚

We are so back ☀️

I once saw a different woman have that used against her in a murder case and immediately knew if I ever committed murder, I’m toast

And here I thought the worst was supposed to be north!

There are definitely some areas that got hit hard. Just not me 😁

I just looked it up and it seems like it was probably more like 5-6”. Typical 😏

Safe to say this blizzard was a bust in the North metro? At least in my yard. We prob had a solid 8” this morning (that’s what she said) but virtually no accumulation the rest of the day today. I made one pass with the snowblower and now that shit is going to be left to melt in 3 days when it’s 50°

The good news is I just happened to take some PTO to start the week. So I don’t care. Blizzard away. I don’t have anywhere to be. And I have a snowblower. So there. You can’t hurt me.

Nope

Is there anything more Minnesotan than stealing a Zamboni to protest Trump

a man is wearing a scarf around his neck and asking someone to excuse him . ALT: a man is wearing a scarf around his neck and asking someone to excuse him .

Adam ‘Bitch Boy’ Thielen wants to come back to MY state and give a retirement press conference after he ditched us mid-season like a little prick?

Well fuck

Tell me more about why I shouldn’t KMS if we sign Kyler Murray, thanks