Huh? What? Say Again?
And other things I don’t get

everyone adores Jesus of Nazareth but forgets about Jesus of Trenton, NJ

google review:
this dentist has the most beautifulest hands i’ve ever seen in my whole entire life ever
⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

thinking of a new way to say overate
maybe “i’ve had too munch”…

the 3lb bag of mandarins business is booming

no movies, no music, no book. just jingling my keys in my face for the full 8 hours of a flight

dude are you seriously drinking from MY cup?

kyle (the coolest kid in school) just gave me a sup and a head nod AMA

sup

using my per diem to buy legos at the airport

you ever think about how you can just pee your pants? it’s an option!

pro tip: the sun can’t see you when you’re in the shade

that sounds pretty good to me

hhhhhhhh......hhhhhh.....h-h-h--h-h-h......H.....H....HHHHHHHHH...........HA (laughing practice)

my boss hates that i ask permission to use the bathroom but how else will he know how much pay to dock

i love that movie, i saw it like two times

i’m the gruntled worker of this establishment, let me know if you need anything

turns out my password was a combination of letters and numbers and one special character

The secret ingredient in the municipal water? Love

Repeating my new mantra: I won’t get pants’d again… I won’t get pants’d agains…. I won’t get pants’d again….

Poser Identification Department, would you like a report a fake emo in your office?

The Dodgers got their name way back when baseball was little hard ball dodgeball

Flirting with the waitress by ordering 100 of everything on the menu

Breakfast foods were all the rage just a few hours ago… now it’s all about lunch??

Early July morning fog over the Appalachian mountains near the NY/NJ border

Are you sure they didn’t whisper “we love” before yelling my name?

You sure they weren’t wearing glasses that made me look like you?

I am once again rearranging my living space

Are you sure they weren’t saying “we don’t like YOU”

Those posts are for a global crowd