cool how i chose to pursue creative work and cannot at this point unchoose it, right?

not sure how to conclude this thought without sounding abjectly self-pitying but i will say this: realising you're bad at the thing you're meant to be good at still hits like the worst possible humiliation. i am incapable of treating it as anything other than a death.

have had cause to think more than usual, lately, about how my experience of higher education was one of the institution stepping on the nape of my neck and grinding my face into the wet carpet of my own irredeemable failings. not in a hot way. I realise I made that sound hot but it was Not

you produce work at that kind of volume and you will inevitably end up with some filler, no matter how good you are, imo (then again, as a queen enjoyer since youth I am biased)

thankfully, because this was also what the last stage of my ~~~immigration journey~~~ looked like, all of this is precedented and therefore totally normal :)

we are at the "facial twitch" "stress nosebleeds" "unable to retain a thought for >5 minutes" stage of moving house

solidarity

@isaac-fellman.bsky.social do we still have books for rowan?? (also HI THANK YOU)

I lowkey think my husband was a little hurt that the cat got my last name rather than his, because I was the one to register her at the vet

Isaac was over there today overseeing the move-in clean and getting such as rugs laid out ahead of move-in day, which is Saturday. I am excited!

a bathroom with beige floor tiles, a dark brown sink cabinet, teal blue walls, and a pink and coral 60s-style shower curtain

a room with one pink feature wall and a multicolored striped rug

more in-progress new place shots. in the long term I think we would like to redo the bathroom floor and sink cabinet but for now I lowkey think this rips

right, like i'll take pinkwashing over the alternative at this juncture

like if the city we live in still feels compelled to treat us as a demographic it has to pretend to respect then that puts it streets ahead of other places where we could be. miserable but less so than the alternative

there are parts of the tenderloin in SF that have trans flag banners hanging from lampposts saying things like “we celebrate our trans history” or “trans people rule ok” (not verbatim, obviously) and you know we’re really in it because I no longer see this as useless pandering, really

it may be too much hassle to bring him into the city for it but we have had nothing but good experiences with Nob Hill Cat Clinic in SF, which is privately owned by someone I believe is normal

Federal judge unloads on ‘unserious’ RFK Jr., says anti-trans policy showed his ‘cruelty’ Judge Mustafa T. Kasubhai vacated the “Kennedy Declaration,” finding it unlawfully attempted to override medical standards and restrict care for transgender youth.

Breaking: HHS’s ban on gender-affirming care is struck down. Rarely have I read a ruling this sharply worded.

“This case is one of a long list of examples of how a leader’s wanton disregard for the rule of law causes very real harm to very real people.”

www.advocate.com/politics/nat...

yeah, I had an acquaintance a few years back who said that nobody who wants power on the internet should ever be given any. of course this was right before he hit me with mod powers without consulting me but I do think he got the first part right at least

okay that’s really good

or, my favourite, both at the same time

first person to say "narcissists" gets the wall, that is reductive and you all know it

i feel like i've seen it happen many times, and i guess i wish i were better at identifying the common factors involved

if i were a scientist i would use my powers of science to study the phenomenon of internet communities imploding, seemingly unprompted, into complex interpersonal beefs that bring the communities themselves to a screeching halt

poking gently at Mark Fisher's Ghosts of My Life

2, personally

i assume they give you the leaflet on the subject along with your citizenship

whatever it is, insurance has plausible deniability re: not covering it

why is the hugeness of "ROMANIZE IT" killing me the way that it is

the chairs are sort of a temporary measure until we can splurge on nicer ones but I really like the contrast between vintage table and very modern chairs

we have a lot of navy blue stuff! including, now, this wall