is this a battle that i must fight, or can i make peace and be part of a solution? throughout my life, i always had to be right, even when i was wrong and boy, oh. boy was i wrong more than once. i was certainly someone who attempted read more: tinyurl.com/4we7j9xb

the hope offered by my peers is a form of love, they offer this love unconditionally to addicts seeking recovery. when i got here, i did not understand what those people were offering, and i was not sure i wanted it of needed it. what i needed read more: tinyurl.com/y7t7b4bc

some parts of who I am are here to stay, while other aspects may need a little work. i am not overly fond of being a work in progress, when it comes to my spiritual and emotional development. i truly hate being compared to an onion read more: tinyurl.com/mvpjty36

i want to be more awake and help others to wake up, as well. once upon a time in what feels like a galaxy far, far away, i lived in the eternal fog of active addiction. in that place i would have told you i was awake and cognizant of the details read more: tinyurl.com/35ztrs36

boredom may sometimes mean that i am locking in the inability to see past myself. i am not quite so sure about that, but i do get the point, my life and how i see the world around me , can be as boring or exciting as i make it. in days gone by read more: tinyurl.com/mf76mtpy

when i am active in my commitment to the Fellowship; when i am disciplined; my addiction is rendered powerless. as i start my 70th trip around Sol, i am more than certain that i am right were i need to be, even though a year ago i could hardly read more: tinyurl.com/mpvxcph7

i know reality and the truth pose no real risk to me today. while it is quite true that my relationship with honesty and reality were far from healthy when i was using, heck even before i used for the first time, read more: tinyurl.com/y833jf2b

recovery does not happen in a vacuum. living clean is all about relationships: with myself, with my loved ones, with my peers in recovery, with society and ultimately with the POWER that fuels my recovery. when i woke up this morning, read more: tinyurl.com/352tmj96

feeling may not be facts, but they are reality and to deny or dismiss them is doing myself a great disservice. shit happens, that is just how the world turn. i know that when life on its own terms drives me to distraction, i have the desire read more: tinyurl.com/ms27sbb5

it is more than enough that i believe in something that helps me stay clean. the Cliff notes version of my search for a spiritual path is that it took the first fifteen years of my clean time to arrive on a path that has become the one read more: tinyurl.com/y2758bzv

when i can shake my old ideas about independence and self-reliance, i practice kindness. i always thought i was a kind person in the vein of i need to be cruel to be kind, to borrow a phrase. i believed that brutal honesty about what i saw read more: tinyurl.com/kzt65e4f

in forming real friendships, i open the gateway to grace, which allows me to view my life from multiple angles. i knew way back when, that all my so-called friendships were temporary. part of that was protection as we moved every year or read more: tinyurl.com/2nh3xcvh

living a program of daily and active recovery helps me to create a bit of order from the chaos of living in this post-modern world. this morning, just had to step out of the box and find some rando topic to write about. it was not as if i read more: tinyurl.com/ykwusx87

i have often been humbled by the kindness of my peers who have supported me when i was the most vulnerable. being vulnerable was certainly not something i had any desire to be, before walking into the rooms. i was brought up in the man-o-sphere read more: tinyurl.com/5d565m8v

as i engaged in my personal journey of discovery to uncover my spiritual path, i knew that it might be a lifelong project. i am grateful that it only took a decade and a half to arrive on that path and begin the walk to a deeper and more read more: tinyurl.com/ychzmnun

including others helps me to belong even more. having the desire to belong anywhere was something i would consciously deny, throughout my life and certainly during my active addiction. the irony, of course, was that my greatest desire read more: bit.ly/4tsMLJl

my spiritual awakenings have taken time to unfold and that seems especially true when it comes to my current resentment list. my seed this morning was all about being in harmony with group conscience is easier when i am actively in harmony read more: bit.ly/4sh6YRp

finding confidence, fulfillment, and the best aspects of my identity as i serve my peers and my fellowship. i have to admit one of the examples that my daily reading used as growth through service, read more: bit.ly/4veVL6I

maintaining open-mindedness, even with years clean, prevents me from becoming too rigid, from building walls that i cannot see over, helping me to navigate new areas of conflict that arise. read more: bit.ly/4c8fkVz

je ne sais quoi i do not know what, is a great way to describe what i felt from those who were present when i first came to the rooms, much less what i feel these days after a minute clean. the whole idea of one addict helping another, without read more: bit.ly/47vycMI

i strive every day to keep myself spiritually balanced, even when i do not know what that may look like, or how to achieve it. that is me exercising a bit of false humility, mea culpa. read more: tinyurl.com/nhzh3v7a

being conscientious and taking pride in contributing my best and then letting go of the result. that has not always been the manner in which i lived my life, much less how i behaved in situations that required collaboration. read more: tinyurl.com/bfub3vy5

each day is filled with opportunities either to escape reality or to show up and live. i am certainly not one of those guys who walk around on cloud nine accepting that no matter what comes my way, there is some divine plan for me read more: tinyurl.com/484mpn4e

unity, anonymity, common welfare -- the Twelve Traditions are rich with principles guiding myself and my peers to better embrace one another, regardless of...
it has been a couple of years since i wrote on this topic, read more: tinyurl.com/mu3jas44

i am as i do, not as i feel or think i am. there is a part of me that resists the notion that how i behave is indicative of who i am. across the course of my recovery i have heard several variations of fake it until you make and acting as if. read more: tinyurl.com/4sscp2xc

my peers and i, often tell newcomers that they will love them until they learn to love themselves. what we as a whole are doing is loving one another back to life. i can certainly say that the first time i heard that someone would love me until read more: tinyurl.com/256sn5n6

when i woke up and accepted recovery, i did not really believe it was possible for me and i certainly did not understand how it would work, BUT i worked STEP ZERO and was willing enough to do whatever it might take. read more: tinyurl.com/fud2phba

am i trying to stand up for principles, do what is easy, or defend the way i have always done it? questions, questions, questions and quite engaging ones at that. what i heard this morning, is that discernment is more about deciding what to do read more: tinyurl.com/454k3jxh

humility helps me see myself simply as a member in a community of equals. throughout my life, i never saw myself as equal to anyone. i was either felt way above those i was with or inferior enough to act arrogantly superior read more: tinyurl.com/4myxzwna