huge red flag considering how beautiful and perfect she is

the death juice is only served from a hose

socks are just underwear for your feet

i'll be blunt, that was damn good

@jcsalterego.bsky.social where are you, your life juice is getting cold, don't you want to stay verified

I know this is a joke, but

This one was actually fine but this should be Bluesky’s motto

people who do autobody repair annoyed that the name "dentist" was already taken

me (to the tiles): you got a lot of carbon scoring looks like you boys have seen a lot of action

seriously, that looks beautiful though... no pitting that i can see, looks like foregoing the skip reentry was the right choice

drinking the life juice is how jerry got verified

had a dream I met some moots irl. all of a sudden i realized they were looking at me funny. i had interrupted something 😬 so I went to sit in front of a mirror and stared at myself eating a hard boiled egg.

r/AmItheAsshole

I (22m) untied the green ribbon around my gf's (21f) neck and her head fell off

10/10. No notes.

ouch, in case it's needed...

app limit for bluesky, daily limit of 23 hours 40 minutes

it's time to take back control. posting this to hold myself accountable

'ham how do u post so much and only get 1-20 likes on average per post'

well first of all fuck you buddy

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We offer endless fun here at River Side Casino. It will never stop. You will have fun forever whether you like it or not.

Here’s another great thing about hot tubs. [pulls out a bowl of fully cooked ramen from under the water]

a tmnt logo that says "tommy toughstuff in the sewer"

welcome back!

drinking the life juice is how jerry got verified

me: there's a typo in your arctic monkeys post

you: do i wanna know?

The Butt-Head in me recognizes the Beavis in you

heheh heheh

DENTIST: Have you been flossing?

ME: Have you?

DENTIST: (sweating) THIS ISN’T ABOUT ME!

perfectly suitable for anyone you roast in the future:

when i read the post i said, wow, it's skip online (raccoon!) posting, how big is that? i was very impressed with myself to have the head of online posting to "get my ass."

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if i did marry juana then weed live happily ever after

perfect weather for eating out

Man Finally Good Enough At New Hobby To Understand How Bad He Is At It

Man Finally Good Enough At New Hobby To Understand How Bad He Is At It theonion.com/man-finally-good-enough-...

plus, fuck a robot. I make ideas with my own weird meat and electricity I generate MYSELF. fuck em.