Fridge Magnets and Memory: Part 1 Fridge magnets are more than tacky souvenirs. They're vessels for our memories.

Gather, my friends, and you shall learn the esoteric history of fridge magnets, and how they function as tacky little references for human memory:

Man Who Threw Molotov Cocktail At Sam Altman’s Home Claims He Was Following ChatGPT Recipe For Risotto

Man Who Threw Molotov Cocktail At Sam Altman’s Home Claims He Was Following ChatGPT Recipe For Risotto theonion.com/man-who-threw-molotov-co...

I think about this ALL THE TIME:
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-r...

I’m extremely tough, is what I’m saying.

The 1969 Easter Mass Incident Content Warnings: Religion, food, symbolic cannibalism, symbolic gore, penis mention, Blasphemy, SO MUCH BLASPHEMY, weapons, war mention.  Mind the warnings and your health always comes first. Its a HILARIOUS story, I promise. As always, all the names have been changed to protect people’s identities.  This is a long one, so Press J now if you want to skip it. When my dad was a young man and still a practicing catholic, he participated in a small church communion that nearly got him and six other people excommunicated. Father Patrick ran a small church outside of California Polytechnical and tended to be… rather more liberal in his interpretations of scripture than most of the church was, which made him something of a hit with the local students and liberally-inclined populace.

I need to share my favourite seasonal Tumblr post, the saga of Bread Jesus, by user gallusrostromegalus, about the 1969 Easter Mass Incident.
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I Work Very Hard, And I Would Like To Try Cake By A Horse Hello. I am a horse. I work very hard at my job of being a horse. When humans say move the heavy thing, I move the heavy thing. When humans sit on top of me and pull on my head, I carry them where they want to go. The main food the humans give me is hay and oats. But I am thinking it would be nice to have a different food. I am thinking I would like to try cake. Yes, yes. Cake. I know all about it. When humans eat cake, it is in glad times. It is the food for a celebration, such as when a woman becomes 47. I have seen cake on the Fourth of July. When humans have a cake, they stand around it and clap hands and smile and say happy birthday at each other. Sometimes there are beautiful markings on a cake, such as balloons or a pink shape. Sometimes the top of a cake is on fire and a boy must blow on the fire with mouth wind. This is the scariest cake. I do not want this kind. But I will eat any other cake. Any cake that is not the fire cake that tries to kill the boy. Please understand: I do not get money for doing work. I do not get to go inside the house. All I am either doing my horse job or standing in my pen or eating food off the floor. I always do these things. But I have never once gotten cake and I would like it very much. I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children. I am more helpful to the farm. Children do not move the heavy things like me or let anyone ride on them. And yet they get cake. Maybe the humans will realize this. Maybe they will say, "You know who deserves cake? That horse. That horse whose back we are always on." Every day I dream about what it will be like if I get to eat cake. Here is what will happen. First, I will walk to the cake and putt my nose at it like hrrfff to make and stomping my hooves to make sure it is not a snake. Then I will trot in a circle to show that I am a horse and I am large. After that, I will nuzzle the cake to …

The horse op-ed is an instant classic. I can't tell you how much joy this piece gives me.

It should be taught in every introductory writing class in no small part because the horse arguments are so compelling. "I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children."

We lasted a whole hour at our local No Kings protest even though I forgot gloves AND sunglasses. Shout out to the face painting table for turning my kids' faces into tiny protest signs.

patiently explaining to national political reporters that the people who organize No Kings are also doing the daily advocacy, voter registration, mutual aid, and immigrant defense, and that just because the cameras show up for the big crowd does not mean that work did not exist before and after

Idk what's going on but SAME

A tube of glow-in-the-dark plastic planets that lists the contents as “8 glowing planets” and “1 glowing Pluto”

I salute the pedantry of the child’s new toy.

At the self checkout:

9: why don't people just steal stuff?

Me: there's cameras, also stealing is usually wrong

9: when is it NOT wrong?

Me, grasping every opportunity to turn a parenting moment into a full-on musical number: if your family is starving and you steal a loaf of bread to feed them

This is hilarious.

Also, completely enraging.

I would have gone with like a Nokia brick or something but my model of kid would lose his own head if it weren't attached

90s Captain Ahab: Thar she blows. Thar she blows again.

We're trying the Cosmo JrTrack, it seems fine so far. The Verizon Gizmo also looked promising.

Unfortunately all my outrage today is reserved for the new Arctic Monkeys song with the lyrics "ten years later, it's been a decade" and I simply do not have the capacity to be outraged by anything more serious at this time. The REDUNDANCY.

Yesss I am planning to get tickets

My daughter: in the TLC song “No Scrubs,” what do they mean by “scrub”?

Me: Honey this is the one and only pop song in history that opens up with a dictionary and thesaurus entry.

A cooling rack full of hamantaschen (apricot, prune, and poppyseed)

TIS THE SEASON

a man in a suit and hat is standing with his hands in his pockets in a black and white photo . Alt: Cary Grant saying get out

Me sending my kids back to school after a week of vacation plus two snow days

my local park is full of hundreds of snow sculptures and someone has been adding museum labels

instantly assumed this was a kaiju situation

You want me to log into Threads? The stuff that terrorizes the people of Pern??

I want a spotter for my bench press but not as badly as I want to loudly talk about why the people refusing to sell or lease vacant property on Main St should pay higher taxes

...this implies that I have chosen a costume, which I also have not, I just forgot that I also need to do that

If it makes you feel better, my spouse/co-host also has not yet chosen a costume (and low-effort sci-fi costumes are ALWAYS in style)

It is Ash Wednesday no one has schmutz on their forehead Today, 8:25 AM

Setting this reminder was perhaps my most brilliant move ever

You may laugh, but the Macbeths are a much better role model for a marriage than Romeo and Juliet. They discuss their problems (killing the king of Scotland), share their hobbies (killing the king of Scotland), and resolve their conflicts (by killing the king of Scotland).

orange line 4 life