The Onion wants to make us submissive slaves to the New world order.

Correct.

February used to have 30 days, but landlords lobbied to have two of the days removed so they could receive more rent in less time.

Criminals, the whole lot of them.

The price of housing

Guy who helped write this poll here and - based on what we know - Parker's sense is almost definitely correct. One thing people don't know about polling is that slicing down what you actually ask is *excruciatingly* difficult. It's almost physically painful. Our whole team dreads it.

I worry about how much fight Apple's going to have for privacy issues with somebody new in the big chair

Death to the Borg all day long
Except @jerilryan.bsky.social, we'll keep her

Mood

All this AI being shoved down our throats in products that do not need AI and we still end up with electronics that come with instruction booklets written in the most broken ass Engrish

"Say Perhaps To Drugs" in sharpie on a yellow brick wall.

DNC 1996 - Macarena Extended YouTube video by Henry Jackson

same energy www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGIr...

Good god, a customer emailed their credit card info "would you please use this for my balance"
Card number, security number, exp. Been sitting in the *general* inbox all weekend. 😭

Y'all, don't email your credit card number to anybody

Bethesda is the only game studio who would release a game on an engine so poorly designed that running it too well causes its own performance issues. Seems like a constant freezing problem I was getting in Fallout 4 was caused by the game running too fast.

Tim Curry in The Rocky Horror Picture Show

Tim Curry in Clue

Tim Curry in The Three Musketeers

Tim Curry in Muppet Treasure Island

Happy 80th birthday to Tim Curry who has always, *always* understood the assignment.

feels like a lot of people in big tech have forgotten that making the sales pitch to the public is *their* problem, not the public's problem.

Fucking awesome

To me, this is blueskyism

Photo I took of these wonderful people (the faces of whom I’ve blacked out) singing happy Birthday to their lovely old dog at a bar I was at tonight in Portland

I was at a dog-friendly bar in NW Portland tonight and a table behind me started singing Happy Birthday and then I realized it wasn’t for a person but a really old dog who was wearing a crown and he was old and fucking adorable and I love this city

The only king we'll kneel to

Credit your sources, folks. Also, quit making online shooters. That gravy train has dried up.

Id's Tim Willits Backs "Always On" Diablo 3 Id's lead design chap, Tim Willits, has been talking to Eurogamer about the "always on" thing. He said this: "Diablo 3 …

Every time Tim Willit is connected somehow to a new game, it automatically lowers my opinion of whatever the game is. I’ve never forgotten or forgiven this fuckery www.rockpapershotgun.com/ids-tim-will...

A pack of two LED flush mount boob lights

everything reminds me of her

a mouse (?) eating cherries (?) and dyed purple around the mouth

girls want one thing, and it's to be this weird little dude absolutely lost in the sauce

Every gay friend group

Not even close

Lady, you are not Martin Luther. Settle down.

Relatable

Oh my god this is amazing

Mutilated a road-killed raccoon. Chainsawed a whale’s head. Dumped a dead bear cub in Central Park.

Isn’t the obvious question to RFK Jr.: What the hell is wrong with you?

Anne Hathaway bought the rights to a novel about a tradwife influencer who wakes up in 1855 and has to actually live the life she's been selling online. The book is called Yesteryear. It came out 3 days ago. The film rights were already sold to Hathaway, who will produce and star.

Holy shit, I have NEVER been more excited for a movie.

some days you're the semi truck, some days you're the possum crossing the road at the wrong moment.