I Feel So Sorry for My A.I. Sunglasses

"They were like a kid who hasn’t done any of the reading but keeps being called on in class — and who also can’t make friends, because all of his classmates think he’s a spy."

“SLEEPY HOLLOW, 1998,” a Story Delivered to Your Mailbox A cozy, nostalgic, 1990s reimagining of “The Legend of Sleepy Hollow,” through mailed letters and story artifacts

My friend @jaybushman.bsky.social launched “SLEEPY HOLLOW, 1998,” a Story Delivered to Your Mailbox today!!

If you like reimagined classic lit, or miss the 90s, or enjoy putting beautiful physical art in your hands, you'll WANT this.

And if all 3? Oh boy.

www.kickstarter.com/projects/jay...

Welcome home, Sweet Prince 🤍 – Imani has also returned to Montrose! 🤍⭐️

The boys are back in town. Let's go!!!

📸: Chicago Piping Plovers (Imani and Pippin, Montrose Protected Beach, April 13, 2026)

“SLEEPY HOLLOW, 1998,” a Story Delivered to Your Mailbox A cozy, nostalgic, 1990s reimagining of “The Legend of Sleepy Hollow,” through mailed letters and story artifacts

We just launched a Kickstarter for SLEEPY HOLLOW, 1998 - a reimagining of the classic set in the 1990s and delivered through a series of letters that come to your mailbox. For anyone who loves classic literature, the 90s, or pie (pie plays a big role in the story) www.kickstarter.com/projects/jay...

“SLEEPY HOLLOW, 1998,” a Story Delivered to Your Mailbox A cozy, nostalgic, 1990s reimagining of “The Legend of Sleepy Hollow,” through mailed letters and story artifacts

My friend @jaybushman.bsky.social launched “SLEEPY HOLLOW, 1998,” a Story Delivered to Your Mailbox today!!

If you like reimagined classic lit, or miss the 90s, or enjoy putting beautiful physical art in your hands, you'll WANT this.

And if all 3? Oh boy.

www.kickstarter.com/projects/jay...

Awesome to see & hear @marchxness.bsky.social essays that I've been thinking about for YEARS read tonight by their authors. Have you picked up your copy of the anthology yet? If not you can get it here & you'll be glad you did:

www.splitlippress.com/product-page...

Every one of those readings was so damn good. Way to close it out @martinseay.bsky.social!!

2026 Aurelie 30 Accountability / Hype Doc Friends, here we are approaching April 2026, so it’s nearly time to dive into the 2026 Aurelie 30. The assignment is simple and straightforward but harder to accomplish than you think: start somethin...

It's almost April which means it's nearly time to do the Aurelie 30, a yearly start-something-new-every-day-in-April open-source writing project. If you'd like to join us, get on the substack (weekly emails in April with generative assignments etc) or the gdoc: docs.google.com/document/d/1...

Interminable Ignorance | Robert Pogue Harrison Why has the will to ignorance become so virulent in our time?

“For most of its history and prehistory, the human race has lived in various states of ignorance and wonder. Even today most of us will accept the disenchantments of knowledge only with great reluctance.” —Robert Pogue Harrison

Hit Repeat until I Hate Music is out!

If you've been reading essays about sadness for the @marchxness.bsky.social tournament, my Sugarhill Gang chapter here is doing...something entirely different. (No one has ever turned away sorrowing from Rapper's Delight. It's right there in the title.)

Very much worth noting that the LLM-plagiarized review is also significantly, dreadfully worse.

When are you going to fire Bret Stephens?

Exciting New Rumpus Initiatives - The Rumpus Debbie Millman and I are thrilled to share some exciting new initiatives we are launching with The Rumpus. Beginning on April 1, 2026, we are increasing

In other news, I am really excited to share some new initiatives we're launching at The Rumpus including increased pay, writing and editorial fellowships, and microgrants. therumpus.net/2026/03/31/e...

If you love music writing, you need this anthology.

I'm beyond honored to have my (favorite) March Xness essay included: "There Are Many Atlantic Cities, and One Belongs to Levon Helm," on The Band's Springsteen cover and my (felon, dreamer, liar, dead) dad, a fellow son of New Jersey.

I’m really happy and overwhelmed to have won the @marchxness.bsky.social championship. So much respect to @cicilybennion.bsky.social and her incredible, vulnerable essay. I felt connected to so many you in this tournament, both through your essays and interacting with you here. I will miss this ❤️

The @marchxness.bsky.social anthology we've all been waiting for is finally here! So thrilled to have my essay on "(I've Had) The Time of My Life" of Dirty Dancing fame included in this much-anticipated mixtape of phenomenal writing. Get yourself a copy today!!

Aahhh!! The final! Got too busy & fell behind on March Sadness! but I’m back to say that both are great essays, so I’m going with the song for my final vote. Ben Folds holds a special place in my heart for being a good song storyteller & Brick has always gutted me.

The @marchxness.bsky.social anthology is out today! I love this tournament, and I’m so glad to have one of my essays from years past got included: “The Best Christian in the World,” about Creed’s “My Own Prison” and my own fallout with Christianity, among other things. So much good writing in here!

Yeah, it's like a gift we've given ourselves, courtesy of Xness! I feel gutted that one of you doesn't get to win, but in a totally non-cliché way we are all winners!

McSweeney's Internet Tendency Daily humor almost every day since 1998.

The Believer/McSweeney's is now accepting applications for paid, part-time editorial interns. Our application window will end on April 24. For more details:

www.mcsweeneys.net/pages/mcswee...

This final feels pretty inevitable to me, especially as an Xennial. Both essays are so good, and so sad, and this is a true 90s heartbreaker of a matchup. My Heart Will Go On is iconic, but Brick devastated an entire generation, and still makes me cry every time. I've gotta go Brick for the win.

Ooh, this pays off but good!!

Just discovered that if you put on Whatever and Ever Amen and immediately start reading @cicilybennion.bsky.social's fantastic essay on "Brick" you will (at my pace at least) reach the paragraph where she introduces the song at *exactly the moment* it starts playing.

he's a brick and she'd be drowning slowly

Ooh, maybe the ship has sailed (Titanic on the brain lol) but if you ever do write one I'd love to read it. I nearly chose "Custom Concern" by Modest Mouse b/c it's the saddest *sounding* song I know, but I had an intuition there was a bigger essay in NMH and, yeah, wow, always trust the muse!

I was pretty worried about that going in, given my personal story is, you know, quite objectively sad; I didn't want pity votes. And for casting votes I felt less queasy focusing on quality of essay, instead of comparative sadness. NGL though, I had to remind myself the outcome wasn't a referendum.

THE March Sadness National Championship: (6) Ben Folds Five's "Brick" & @cicilybennion.bsky.social against (1) Celine Dion's "My Heart Will Go On" & @mfitejohnson.bsky.social! Listen to the songs! Read the essays! Which is the saddest? YOU DECIDE (by 9am AZ time 3/31): marchxness.com#/sadnesscham...

Oh gosh, thank you, Martin, I needed this today. 😊 Much credit as always to @kathleenmrooney.bsky.social for inculcating devotion to info management!

Final Four @marchxness.bsky.social voting is open now through Friday, March 27, at noon Eastern/9 a.m. Pacific! Please consider voting to send Celine and me (and my dog Jazzy, pictured here) to the championship game!

Oh hey it's me. And YES you should apply.