MFW i drop a kraft slice on it

Dr. Zoidberg from Futurama emerging from a door dressed as Jesus.

When Trump said he thought the Jesus meme was a doctor his tertiary syphilis was just playing old episodes of Futurama:

two images of the human body's circulatory system. One of them with good cable management

The human circulatory system, before and after proper cable management.

Perfect Sunday morning mood

a woman in a green sequined top holds a sign that says liza ALT: a woman in a green sequined top holds a sign that says liza

I will be speaking like an old timey gay or Liza Minnelli today to antagonise my fiancé for making me watch a period drama last night.

Soon??

Exactly one year ago today:

I mean I want to see this movie anyway, but this certainly helps. #streetfighter

I love a mashup heading into the weekend

My fiancé now collects stamps... I made fun of him but isn't this exactly the same as collecting Pokémon cards?

two men are looking at each other in a room . ALT: two men are looking at each other in a room .

When you hear someone say they "woke up with a scratchy throat", you know that's some soft-launch sickday shit

I really can't differentiate this from scary movie I've seen them both too often

Steamed Hams full transcript Well, Seymour, I made it- despite your directions. Ah. Superintendent Chalmers. Welcome. - I hope you're prepared for an unforgettable luncheon. - Yeah. Oh, egads! My roast is ruined. But what if I were to purchase fast food and disguise it as my own cooking? Delightfully devilish, Seymour. Ah- Skinner with his crazy explanations The superintendent's gonna need his medication When he hears Skinner's lame exaggerations There'll be trouble in town tonight Seymour! Superintendent, I was just- uh, just stretching my calves on the windowsill. Isometric exercise. Care to join me? Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour? Uh- Oh. That isn't smoke. It's steam. Steam from the steamed clams we're having. Mmm. Steamed clams. Whew. Superintendent, I hope you're ready for mouthwatering hamburgers. I thought we were having steamed clams. D'oh, no. I said steamed hams. That's what I call hamburgers. You call hamburgers steamed hams? Yes. It's a regional dialect. - Uh-huh. Uh, what region? - Uh, upstate New York. Really. Well, I'm from Utica, and I've never heard anyone use the phrase "steamed hams. " Oh, not in Utica. No. It's an Albany expression. I see. You know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger. Oh, no. Patented Skinner burgers. Old family recipe. - For steamed hams. - Yes. Yes. And you call them steamed hams despite the fact that they are obviously grilled. Ye- You know, the- One thing I should- - Excuse me for one second. - Of course. Well, that was wonderful. A good time was had by all. I'm pooped. Yes. I should be- Good Lord! What is happening in there? - Aurora borealis. - Uh- Aurora borealis at this time of year at this time of day in this part of the country localized entirely within your kitchen? - Yes. - May I see it? No. Seymour. ! The house is on fire. ! No, Mother. It's just the northern lights. Well, Seymour, you are an odd fellow but I must say you steam a good ham.

Today is officially the 30th anniversary of Steamed Hams. On April 14, 1996, "22 Short Films About Springfield" aired for the first time!

Peak catdad shirt i need

Santiago? Looks very familiar. I'm usually in Los Gigantes

Interacting with old people?

a man in a red robe is sitting in a chair and smiling while saying what an idiot . ALT: a man in a red robe is sitting in a chair and smiling while saying what an idiot .

I just witnessed a straight guy i know get a bear paw tattoo... Oh sweet child of summer.

Me, drunk after lunch, accidentally becoming a labor revolutionary to terminally online leftists:

Hearing the results in Hungary 🇭🇺. That's one less Russian asset in power. 😌

Literal food porn 😍

British Plugs Are Better Than All Other Plugs, And Here's Why YouTube video by Tom Scott

Actually I'll just leave this core part of the internet here:

youtu.be/UEfP1OKKz_Q?...

The earth pin is also longer to make sure you can't actually bridge your fingers over the live and neutral accidentally shocking yourself.

I have questions like who leaves a plug on the floor?! Mad behaviour imo.

Less chance of an electric shock or falling out is untrue. Go over to your UK plug and try and pull the thing out the wall from the cable. Not going to happen.

Nearly had a heart attack

#Cat
#Caturday

Who's the biggest edgelord here? Who has the biggest following?
Who was your first edgelord?

a man in a trench coat stands in front of a kennedy for president sign ALT: a man in a trench coat stands in front of a kennedy for president sign

Tony Shalhoub is so good in the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel

I've gone down this path. I have too many now and a lot of very good dupes or "inspired by" aftershaves.

Depluralize a movie:

Star War

The Iranian Embassy in South Africa weighs in:

Some geek shit game night