I always ask if they fancy a feast

Don’t talk about my putty tat like that #catlady #redflag #menbelike

“Sorry kids, but you know how President Grumpa gets when he hasn’t taken his meds.” #dementia #ai #propoganda

No joke I actually DID have mass arson on my 2026 bingo card.

“That’s high praise.”
-Nic Caged Andy Samberg
#trump #popeleoxiv

Spectacularly yuuuge

Funny how we have a whale in DC that needs to go extinct to save the entire ecosystem #trump #endangeredspecies #deportation

The mission is clear #jackblack #tenaciousd #easter

This is Jesust a tribute #jackblack #tenaciousd #easter

I’m ready for hot girl summer so I’m migrating to Alaska to do it there.

Now she can be a housewife! #pambondi #workingwoman #yourefired #maga #sadclown

Why can’t I meet the famous person of my dreams and live famously infamously for the rest of our lives

A reboot of The West Wing but it’s just the exact same show with an Epstein always in frame.

“Kiss my ass” is never received the way it’s intended.

🤣 that head is big enough to colonize

Charlie Kirk's Mentor Jeff Webb, the Father of Modern Cheerleading, Dies in Freak Pickleball Accident Jeff Webb, one of Charlie Kirk’s mentors and the father of modern cheerleading, has died at age 76 following a freak pickleball accident

Shocker. The man who monopolized the cheer and dance industry mentored Trump’s biggest cheerleader.
people.com/jeff-webb-de...

No one:

Me in a cute lil outfit I put together to feel good about myself: DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT THINKING ABOUT LOOKING AT ME YOU SICK FREAK.

At this point I trust other people to record ICE so we should maybe continue to phase 2…

Turns out my glow up was just inflammation.

I just feel like it’s not hard for someone to kill it since it just sits there most of the time…

In my “how can I make men afraid of me” era.

“I don’t have the bandwidth for this right now.”
-my computer on its last leg

Uh oh! Another man told me I’m not a comedian cuz I said “Chuck Norris was the worst part of Dodgeball, which says a lot because Vince Vaughn is in it.” He must be right because he is a male fitness trainer and is therefore much more qualified in my line of work.

#womenshistorymonth #formalapology

#trump #censored

If I promise not to break character will you guys let me give DT his next spray tan?

Weather the weather whether we weather whatever #storms #eastcoast #climatecrisis

JFC! The right already stripped abortion rights from millions of women. Contraception is next.

Project 2025 made the agenda clear. This was never about saving babies. It’s about control, pushing women back into submission and forcing more births.
1/2

She is in the way that Kanye is which is not well

Went to write to-do list. Forgot everything I needed to do. Went to do something else. Remembered that I won't remember what to do without writing a to-do list. So far I've gotten one thing done on my to-do list, which is "write to-do list." I wrote no other items, because I forgot what to do. #adhd

Alas, I have taken ill. Thus, I request an abundance of rotating sexless lovers to carry the burden of caring and tending to my body. I will pay nothing. Please make arrangements.