Molly is such a cool girl name

Anyway you can tell we are going into a recession because the Grammys were good this year

Abuse dynamics aside, Kanye’s brain is too rotted by p*rn to make good art because Bianca Sensori’s see-through dress absolutely would have hit with armpit hair and a huge merkin

Also yes this is my first tweet in two years

My kid asked me “if we were all babies together would we all be friends like the rugrats” to her dad and I and the answer is a resounding YES

She’s so real for this

Immediately yes. YTA

“AITA for attempting to repo my ex gf’s boobs” is sending me

Absolutely the latter. Here is RFK making a completely silent Dennis Kucinich act as his human easel

I went to see them debasing themselves. Here is RFK ordering around Dennis Kucinich

Mf said dopey tart

I joined this group solely because my friend Stella sent me this hilarious post

The rules of this hosta group I joined on Facebook are sending me

this is a podcast by @justinkcomer.rockhardcauc.us, @violintj.rockhardcauc.us, @hot4trotsky.bsky.social, and two other people who aren't even on this website so what do you care

My city has incredible little Asian and Eastern European markets and I love love love them, you just have to know the cans WILL be dusty and you absolutely will not know what meat is in the freezer and cannot ask

“Ethnic” grocery stores are such underrated gems for high quality cheap ingredients. BUT they do always have a freezer full of unlabeled ziplock bags of what can only be described as “flesh”. Otherwise 10/10

Exactly. If it’s a grizzled old man it’s a snake. If it’s a woman it may be a box turtle but same idea

People at the farmers market love to just be holding a snake

Every time I open Reddit I see fresh horrors

Oh my god the borax people dude

This is SUCH a funny one-two punch

Fortune tonight is what Judas said to Jesus

They just really loved saying that but like objectively all these children are not friends

Texting my partner during our child’s summer camp program at pickup

My husband’s boss says “out of pocket” when he means “unavailable” (eg “I will be out of pocket this afternoon”) and it is SENDING ME. SIR I am not really sure that is any of my business but thanks for looping me in

Whatever’s happening back there is between my head and god

I know the concept that women do their makeup and hair for themselves is a LIE, because if that were the case I wouldn’t be stuck trying to style the back. I can’t even see it back there

Excited to announce my new hyperfixation: underprepared rich men traveling to places that are too cold for them 🙏✨

Me playing literally any game where I have to use one joystick to walk and a whole second joystick to look around. Don’t get me started on having to also use a weapon