With the help of the Sandy Hook families, The Onion has reached a long-awaited deal to take over InfoWars.
We've enlisted the help of @timheidecker.bsky.social, who will be InfoWars' Creative Director.
Please stand by for more.
another all-timer from Roth.
also, i'm going to be working "Mr. Met is an Antisemite!!!!!" into any situation i can. probably going to sign it in some birthday cards
Non-agricultural people are being ignorant about the difference and uses of hay and straw in my mentions as a result of this discussion so let's break it all down in broad strokes but finer than these to explain why no one is using hay for a mattress in a medieval setting.
Have you watched LIFE UNEARTHED yet!? Binge the first 2 episodes on the PBS app, Apple TV or Amazon in the U.S. and Canada.
Outside the U.S. or Canada? Catch the first episode of LIFE UNEARTHED right here: youtu.be/XFXHwz8PgcY?...
Come for the tardigrades, stay for the epic views. 🧪🦠
TRUMP: Do you think men should play in women's sports?
DOORDASH DRIVER: I really don't have an opinion on that. I'm here about no tax on tips.
Now would be a great time to reconsider that 46% cut to NASA’s science budget for FY2027.
The amazing, letter-perfect performance of NASA this week is a ferocious rebuke to the right-wing fools who constantly tell us that for-profit businesses always do a job better than the government.
i firmly believe that kennedy wants preventable diseases to rip through american communities since, in his warped mind, those who survive without vaccines will have proven themselves “healthy.”
Treble Clef: here are the notes I hope you like them ☺️
Bass Clef: I moved all your stuff, good luck finding anything, Ds are Fs now fuck you
Happy anniversary to all who celebrate (the greatest celebrity-on-celebrity social media takedown of all time)
The four humans who have traveled the furthest from Earth. (Via NASA.)
Humanity did that. Science did that. Publicly-funded research did that. Excellent universities did that. Diversity did that. International cooperation did that.
Artemis II is a perfect example of what we can do at our best.
Welcome home, Integrity crew!
Hillary Clinton testified for 11 hours regarding Benghazi and 6 hours regarding Epstein because she didn’t have anything to hide, yet bribe for hire Pam Bondi is illegally refusing to show up to a deposition regarding Epstein because she has everything to hide. Lock Pam up.
The hungry red panda at the Prospect Park Zoo? Adorable.
The HungryPanda delivery app scamming small businesses? Not adorable. So they will be paying $580,000 back.
We'll keep pursuing companies that take advantage of New Yorkers, and we'll keep asking if we can pet a red panda just for a second.
A guy asking ChatGPT to review a series of fart sound effects and getting a serious kiss ass response that calls it atmospheric
I can't stop laughing at this post. It's perfect.
Joe Kernen comes close to having a coronary on air as Pete Buttigieg dogwalks him all over the Squawk Box studio about Trump's economic mismanagement and inflation
CBS never addresses how much money any other department of the federal government lost last year. So I'll help!
The United States, which lost $980 billion in 2025 due to interest payments on the national debt,
The U.S. Department of Agriculture, which lost $213.3 billion in 2025,
and so on
After almost twenty years on the platform, EFF is logging off of X.
This isn’t a decision we made lightly, but it might be overdue. 🧵 (1/5)
www.eff.org/deeplinks/2...
A panel from the webcomic, showing a tortured genius ("I cannot know love, but by God I will know if every polynomino with an area divisible by six can tile a hexagon!") and claiming that not all mathematicians are like that, honestly.
Lovely comic collaboration between Terry Tao @teorth.bsky.social and Zach Weinersmith @zachweinersmith.bsky.social, on what mathematicians are actually like. Less weird than you might think! Apparently they really care about oranges.
www.smbc-comics.com/comic/sphere...
Rep. Nathaniel Moran (R-Texas) is the first House Republican to speak out against Trump's genocidal threat against Iran.
"I do not support the destruction of a 'whole civilization.'" www.huffpost.com/entry/latest...
Armageddon is terrible, but our only other option was diversity trainings at work.
Two pictures of the pillsbury dough boy: once is on a purple background with the caption “he is risen! happy Easter!”, and the other is tan and brown, similar to a cracker, on a white background saying “he is not! Happy Passover!”
It’s time to post one of my favorite memes of the year.
Black text on white background “Happy Easter, New York! Today, millions of New Yorkers celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ and the victory of hope over despair and faith over fear. As the air warms and cherry blossoms begin to bloom, this holy day is a sacred time to pause and reflect on a season of rebirth. Whether you spend this day singing in pews, parading on Fifth Avenue, joining a processional guided by the bamboo trumpets of Haitian Rara music, or hunting for painted eggs amidst the spring grass, I wish every New Yorker celebrating a joyous day. Let us all embrace this holiday's spirit of hope and renewal as we build the City — and the world — that we deserve.”
I'm going to fix Bluesky's user growth issues. I'm going to start posting about which MLB players have "George Lucas-ass names" again. Sorry about that.
sindar-princeling Bilbo barely passed Old Took's record lifespan after having a supernaturally-life-extending ring for 60 years. which begs a question. what the hell did Old Took do mitsuhachiinthehive I have a theory that somewhere back up the line gandalf fucked a took. This sounds like complete crack but hear me out. The tooks are rumored to have "fairy blood" which in LOTR terms means either elves or maia. There is an ancestor who's unusually tall and many of them are noted to live unusually long lives unless they meet with illness or injury, same as the numenorians did. They don't hve extra pointy ears and elves don't have a special interest in the line. But who DOES have a special interest in looking after tooks (and bilbo who is a took on his mother's side/his adopted son frodo)? Gandalf. That dude is ALWAYS fussing over some silly little guy. He regularly brought the old took birthday presents. Back in the day some bold hobbitess decided to climb that old man and ever since then gandalf has been looking after his line of tiny crazy bastards and no one will convince me otherwise.
So my more Tolkien-minded friends how do we feel about this theory? Because I mean it makes a lot of sense…
Spot on.
My PHYS400: Nuclear and Particle Physics students and I wrote a paper! It was posted on the arXiv yesterday (April 1) for context. :)
Muon colliders are cool and all...but have you considered a tau collider?
arxiv.org/abs/2604.00440
This was a great learning experience for all involved!
Both of Marco Rubio’s parents were born in Cuba. Marco Rubio was born in Miami in 1971, before they became US citizens. He is a US citizen because he was born in the US under birthright citizenship. #Hypocrites
