Here, allow me to demystify this for you: Lying orange sack of shit lies while being a lying orange sack of shit

we all know I have no life, so:

Verge headline: Silicon Valley has forgotten what normal people want by Elizabeth Lopatto Illustration of a brain melting in the sun

"In the place of problem-solving technology, companies have jumped on successive bandwagons like NFTs, the metaverse, and LLMs. What these all have in common is that they are not built to really solve a market problem. They are built to make VCs and companies rich."

Read more: buff.ly/Yu2AUFy

“Kermit, you are needed in the Temporal Cold War. What do you know about Jonathan Archer?”

"I hope you die" is old and boring. "I hope a bland free to play team-based shooter carried solely by brand imagery makes it way more difficult to talk about a game you actually like" is real. It's scary. It can happen.

That looks so cool! Very interesting visuals, I dig it

A mixed set of playing cards showing a Pokémon card a magic the gathering card and Uno card and a poker card

WHITE HOUSE: You don't have the cards

WHITE HOUSE HAND:

Today is the 251st anniversary of Paul Revere's midnight ride to warn the Minutemen of approaching British troops.

I want to take a moment to share an excerpt from the Declaration of Independence's grievances against King George III.

Remind you of anyone?

This makes way more sense if you view the post as if he’s a toddler telling you his plans for a cool building. “And it’ll have laysaw beams and dinosaws and Bluey and dump twucks“

Anybody else real thrown off by how we invaded Venezuela, kidnapped a sitting president, replaced him with compliant goons and then… we just… stopped talking about it?

ChatGPT: you’re right you’re so much smarter than him. He’s so schlubby and you’re so suave. Columbo will never catch you.

‘Everyone is Replaceable’: Death Rattles Oregon Amazon Facility A worker died at Amazon’s Troutdale warehouse last week. Employees were told to look away.

A worker died at an Amazon warehouse in Oregon last week.

For more than an hour, workers were instructed to continue working as the man lay dead.

One worker wanted to help, but a manager told them to “Just turn around and not look. Let’s get back to work," according to @thewesternedge.bsky.social.

A video recording of Gul Dukat playing on a view screen from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.

ATTENTION BAJORAN WORKERS: The Kai is WEAK on crime

When you open with “the Pope is WEAK on crime” I just have to wonder if you know what a Pope is

I’m trying very hard to not have a stroke or aneurysm right now

Once of the best things about getting older and losing ego is that I'm not snobby about music anymore. If I like it, it's good. If it's not for me, that doesn't make it bad. Just means it's not for me.

Wow, I can’t believe sending our man with the least charisma on earth and two of our real estate developers of all time didn’t result in successful negotiations.

George Lucas, looking amused with a smirk in a promotional headshot photo of his. The implication being, this is his face as he feels vindicated for his plot of Phantom Menace, that we all thought was dumb.

Well, well, well. Taxation of trade routes are in dispute, huh? Interesting

It’s really neat to hear finance dudebros on TV telling me it’s actually just a vibesession. Oh okay, I’m making the most I’ve made in my life but living paycheck to paycheck, eating ramen for lunch every day with 50% of my income going to rent and another 25% to gas but sure, it’s all in my head

Man, Ramona books were my jam for a while there as a kid. I spent a whole summer reading every one of them. Love me some Beverly Cleary

Cubone. Autocorrect got me

Cub is cool. Personally, it’s Alakazam for me

Today was ass. Very stressful ass. But ending the night watching 1993’s excellent movie adaptation of The Fugitive is a good way to wrap up. Seen it countless times, still love it. Holds up well

Bribe. IBM has agreed to pay the government a $17 million bribe and to reinstate white supremacy within the organization. Call it what it is, @cnn.com

End of an era. A complicated, uneven, but really great when it was good era.

That’s not a bad take, that’s an objectively correct take

Man Forced To Come Up With 45 Seconds Of Facial Expressions While Waitress Lists Off Specials

Man Forced To Come Up With 45 Seconds Of Facial Expressions While Waitress Lists Off Specials theonion.com/man-forced-to-come-up-wi...

Arby’s Reclassifies Their Food As Entertainment Restaurant Says Menu Items Intended For Amusement Purposes Only

Arby’s Reclassifies Their Food As Entertainment theonion.com/arbys-reclassifies-their...

Dude, that was a clear condition of the agreement YOU said was acceptable. God, what a moron.

I have a ritual every time I see one on the road: I say outloud, to myself if alone or to my passenger, “There he is. The biggest fucking loser I’ll see today.”