In honor of Tim Cook's stepping down, here is the story of how I emailed him, not once but twice, with open email tracking enabled, only to discover that, not once but twice, my emails to the CEO of Apple were opened on a computer running Windows.
baseball is the only American sport that would react this way to a goose, which speaks to both the best and worst about baseball
This Is Just To Say
I have turned off
the AI features
that were in
the update
and which
you were probably
hoping
to monetize
Fuck you
they were stupid
so unnecessary
and so annoying
the best argument for feminism is to just let an old woman talk at you about her career experiences
UPDATE: Forbes removed its ForbesPredict poll from this article.
Ah, the stellar "you have to do fucking *homework* in order to understand our new movie" strategy that's been such a clearcut winner for Marvel in recent years, A+, bravo
A round, fried hors d'oeuvre sits on a plate with a shocked expression. It is surrounded by others like it, except for an empty spot next to it.
“GUYS! WAKE UP! SOME DUDE JUST ATE CARL!”
Not if that job is physical comedy
This discourse rolls around every six months and I'm always happy to chime in: ELEMENTARY is a great TV show qua TV show and best modern interpretation of Holmes, including that one you're thinking of, which was more of one dude's intermittent hobby, which also somehow turned into CRIME DR. WHO.
I spent vanishingly few of my waking hours this week not working in some way and now i am at the end of it and pausing to comprehend all the things I kinda absorbed by osmosis and man I just want to nap maybe forever
"The backlash was swift after a group identifying itself as Philz baristas posted a Change.org petition on April 5 against the move by the San Francisco-born coffee chain, which was bought by a private equity company Freeman Spogli last year"
www.sfchronicle.com/food/restaur...
there is a really beautiful essay in here, and no one is talking about it because folks on here are permanently stuck in "discourse about the headline" mode. I would encourage you to not just post a pitchy response to the social copy, and actually read a thing,
Zohran Mamdani: "If you are a Mario Kart fan, government is Yoshi and philanthropy is the Golden Mushroom, that edge we need to beat Bowser on the Rainbow Road. To belabor this metaphor even further, Bowser is corporate greed in this scenario."
As a reminder, ai cannot have the em dash
The more Bluesky tells me that the timeline is "forbidden" the more I'm going to refresh the page.
Seeing @praddenkeefe.bsky.social at #1 and @mollycrabapple.bsky.social at #4 on the NYT bestseller list tonight is not only thrilling news generally but a welcome and much-needed sign that serious, risk-taking narrative nonfiction has a wide audience.
Article from The Wrap. Headline that reads: Inside Doug Liman's $70 Million Al-Made Movie Starring Casey Affleck and Gal Gadot "Bitcoin: Killing Satoshi" will be looking for buyers at Cannes and is billed as the first fully-generated, studio-quality Al feature film Emily Zemler April 15, 2026 @ 6:00 AM
One of those headlines that just gets hilariously worse as you read it
3% of millennials report hating dinosaurs.
A split bar chart of YouGov polling data with the headline: "Americans are most likely to say T. Rex is their favorite dinosaur, but many don't have a favorite." The chart has the sub-headline: "Which of the following is your favorite dinosaur? (%)." The chart has the note: "Note: "Other" includes responses of archaeopteryx, spinosaurus, plesiosaur, ankylosaurus, allosaurus, parasaurolophus, dilophosaurus, diplodocus, iguanadon, and pachycephalosaurus, as well as responses of "other." We know pterodactyls and plesiosaurs aren't dinosaurs. Opinion about dinosaurs comes from the question, "How much do you like or dislike dinosaurs?""
A shocking new poll result: Many Americans somehow don't have a favorite dinosaur.
And only 6% give the correct answer (triceratops).
Check out YouGov's new polling on Americans and dinosaurs: yougovamerica.substack.com/p/whats-your...
Coffeebot: do u like drinking caramel
Me: I guess so
Coffeebot: do u like drinking toothpicks
Me: no
Coffeebot: alright u want full caramel and half toothpicks now here is a map to the ocean
as a child, i don't think i ever really anticipated the role that headphones would play in my adult working life
The lead organizer of SantaCon NYC, an annual Christmas-themed bar crawl that is both beloved and reviled, took more than half of the nearly $3 million the event raised for charity over five years, federal prosecutors said on Wednesday.
Happy 415 Day, San Francisco! The city was incorporated 176 years ago today.
Love to live in our greater fool economy.
all due respect but i do not think shepherds know what pie is
AP news alert Luck of the draw 14m ago A man bought a $117 raffle ticket on a whim over the weekend. The decision won him a $1 million Pablo Picasso painting.
I like that this implies there’s a way to buy a raffle ticket in a manner far more serious than “on a whim”
I really really want one of the new cute ford broncos but EV.
"Order shipped" is NOT THE SAME AS "order processed" and I want to find the linkedin-brained-bro who sold this idea to ecommerce i just wanna find him
