Altered Cook

Pablo is on an all-timer heater and @bencollins.bsky.social is an amazing guest. I am absolutely in love with this pairing.

We go way back

My friend's cat had one kitten. Just one little perfect kitten. This is so cute

Orange tabby cat with a stern expression in a cozy living room. Transcribed Text: Me, waiting for my turn to speak, but the topic's already changed.

Tuesday

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The nanites.

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Characters? I got some ideas if you need any help.

Thank you, Bill.

Video: ‘Homophobic’ 6-Week-Old Baby Cries After Gay Dad Tells Him ‘There Is No Mama’

Maybe we'll keep some InfoWars content up.

InfoWars Let me tell you a story. When I was a child, I suffered from night terrors. It was always the same dream: I could hear my family and neighbors wailing…

Some timeline stuff:
— We expect to get InfoWars.com after the judge clears it in a couple of weeks.
— We'll build a world of characters on the site and across social media. Tim Heidecker is in charge, and we have grand designs.
— Visit theonion.info, buy a subscription, help us dominate the world.

With this new InfoWars, we will democratize psychological torture, welcoming brutal and sadistic ideas from everyone, even the very stupidest among us. It will be like the Manhattan Project, only instead of a bomb, we will be building a website. The InfoWars of tomorrow will converge into a swirling vortex of content about content, talent acquiring talent, rings of concentric media mergers processing all human artistry into one endlessly digestible slurry. This will be a dank, sunless place, one where panic and capital feed on each other like twins in the womb of a hulking, unknowable monster—a monster known by many names, but which I like to call modern-day America.

What a beautiful piece of writing from my boss, @brycetetraeder.bsky.social.

theonion.com/at-long-last...

We're about to find out!

https://www.theonion.info/

Hey everybody! I am taking the helm of this classic American institution with @theonion.com and want to know what you fine folks would like to see from us.

So...you got a good surprise.

This response explains it much better.
Stop blaming everyone else for the politicians openly brushing aside voters and playing the lesser of two evils argument for over a decade. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
www.c-span.org/clip/public-...

LOL.

THAT'S RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Celebrate our historic victory by seizing control of an Onion membership and InfoWars tote. Become A Member. Get The Paper. Plus A Tote.

Celebrate our historic victory by seizing control of an Onion membership and InfoWars tote. membership.theonion.com/iw/

How The Onion Won the Infowars Sale — and Shut Up Alex Jones for Good YouTube video by PABLO TORRE FINDS OUT

Watch the whole episode here:

a brown poodle is sitting next to a wooden table and smiling . ALT: a brown poodle is sitting next to a wooden table and smiling .

You seem like a genuinely great guy so thank you as well, Mister Onion.

Sorry to be overly sincere for a second, but here's why we decided to persevere through all of the bullshit and take over InfoWars.

There's just gotta be a line somewhere.

Thank you @pablo.show for letting me talk so openly about this.

oh

Infowars/Onion combo logo in rainbow saying “I support the onion’s hostile media takeover.”

It’s finally happened. After 18 months. Finally, a media merger you can root for.

There's a war on for your mind.

theonion.info

Join The Onion Don’t just read the news. Feel it. Be among the first to feel the news.

Fun fact: The Onion's acquisition of Infowars was an almost 2-year long process that cost a shit ton of money.

Much more fun fact: You can show your appreciation by subscribing to the Onion for $9 a month AND get a print copy delivered right to your doorstep. membership.theonion.com

Word.
bsky.app/profile/did:...

Ben flipping off Trump tower during an anti-ICE protest :)

@bencollins.bsky.social, you're my hero. I couldn't be prouder of you.

I truly cannot overstate how proud I am of Ben, not just as my partner but as my friend, as a human. He's the strongest and bravest person I know. Also the best cat dad.

And when one of the world's worst bullies threatened to ruin his life, he kept going. Because it's the right thing to do.