I can scroll Reddit just as well at O’Hara as on my couch.

The Fraud's Prayer:
Our Father, who art in the White House,
hallowed be thy combover;
thy blingdom come;
thy will be dumb;
In Washington as you are in Florida.
Give us this day our daily round of golf.
And forgive us our insider trading,
as we refuse to forgive those who investigate against us...

Ok but what if you didn’t go?

Jesus wept.

Uh. He can read? Maybe
Make it a short one like “Jesus wept.”

Release the Epstein Files

Should have had cake.

In the United States. 😭

Congrats on “opening” a strait that was open six weeks ago, and all it cost was at least 13 dead service members, thousands of dead Iranian civilians, tens of billions in taxpayer dollars, our loss in global standing, and the Iranian regime’s increase in power. Phenomenal work.

You can block them too! Like block a whole stack at once even! Nice work ❤️

If this was the only stupid thing he had done but this is not even in the top 10 for the past month.

Did he ask chatGPT for an appropriate bible verse?

Pulpit Fiction

Hegseth quotes a fictional hitman as if it's the Bible

She would be rolling her eyes if she had only had less Botox.

Why would anyone sell him legal insurance? Seems like a very poor business decision

I fear we will end in a desolate wasteland with this orange fool clutching his Diet Coke & screaming “‘My poll numbers are better than anyone has ever seen before!”

Screenshot of a tweet by Mary Margaret Olohan (@MaryMargOlohan) reporting that Erika Kirk had to skip a Turning Point USA event due to threats, with Andrew Kolvet stepping in to interview Vice President Vance in her place. The embedded video shows two men seated on a stage in front of a large "This Is The Turning Point" branded backdrop with an American flag motif and a full audience.

“You have the con. Kirk out.”

For some reason it annoys me when my coworkers all respond “I am on it!” When I assign a task. I asked you to download a document, not smuggle war-plans out of occupied Berlin.

Who among us has not mistaken the holy words of Quentin Tarantino's Pulp Fiction for biblical scripture?

Yes I should try Lyft. A friend was using uber so I just tried that first. I do not use that much but today I had 3 dr appts and am already just so tired…

Does it charge you more for that? It charges me more!

I am such a huge fan of sex education they consists of more than just “don’t you dare.” Some of us are did not get taught anything useful at home. The kids these days have the internet but chat GPT probably recommends Saran Wrap for protection…

My uber driver is auditioning for formula 1. I should have paid for more a lady.

Actually cis men to be more specific. I have never met a nb or trans man who smelled like they rolled around in cologne.

Why is it that the people who wear WAY TOO MUCH fragrance are almost always AMAB?

Please! I had to pay extra because I have a small business and then extra to have my refund sent to my bank. Extra! To get money they owe me! I could have gotten it for free on a debit card I do not want. Hell no.

Oh honey you need a lot of therapy.

He is a sneaky little bastard.

I am not sure someone whose entire political career consists of 2 years in senate plus 1 year and 3 months as VP should presume to school world leaders.

I can see how you could confuse an image of a doctor and a (white Christian national) version of Jesus if you were the least Christian POTUS to ever live.