Friday

Me thinking me not gettin figgy pudding to me tinkin maybe figgy pudding to me hearin’ im gettin figgy pudding!

Karen Bass is proposing a $124 million increase to the LAPD's operational budget. This would bring their total budget to north of $3.6 billion

It’s my birthday week and I live in LA and I hate to ask for favors or take advantage of more famous/connected friends but if ANYONE can hook it up it’s been a lifelong dream of mine to punch John Krasinski in the face.

A whole civilization will die tonight

Gonna have a listening party at the Hollywood Bowl this May

Just so you understand, this is as if you prepared for argument in front of a panel that included Cookie Monster, and Cookie Monster asked you a question about cookies, and you had not thought about cookies in advance.

Watching that Rob Schneider CPAC set makes me want to write tighter emails to Adam Sandler.

Trump shitting his diaper “Thank you for your attention to this splatter”

Insane to me that people still defend the richest country in the history of the world that made The Fabulous Baker Boys that now bombs schoolchildren as a rule, protects pedophiles like it’s breathing, has a bigger wealth gap than the gilded age, and you can’t even stream The Fabulous Baker Boys.

Why Birds Around the World All Seem to Be Collecting Cigarettes It seems that by lacing their nests with cigarette butts, several species of birds have learned to keep pests and parasites away.

Because they’re cool as fuck?

www.jezebel.com/birds-collec...

Our most recent gen 2 trillion dollar plane program. You will not have health care. You will not have good schools. You will not own a home. You will not be able to afford to travel. You will work until you drop dead in debt or you will be in a jail cell.
Anything else is socialism.

Make America (the)Great(Satan) Again

New White House ad
🎶Put the Boots on the Ground🎶
To the tune of Let the Bodies Hit the Floor

I thought Train Dreams was a Diddy biopic.

Every comedy special should be called Clowns Ignorining the Genocide or Why Rogan’s Famous

In other news we also bombed Ecuador today. I assume because we heard some little girls were running around feeling joy for a second there too

but I do know they’ve all, at least once, done matching pajama Christmas cards.

Look I’m not saying every comic I know doing the harm-reduction argument two years out from the primaries while the Democratic Party is the only thing on earth with an approval rating lower than Donald Trump comes from a comfortable family,

I, for one, am SHOCKED the leaders of both parties that allowed cops to harass parents of Uvalde victims without a word also are currently not mentioning this.

Hasan Talks To Jeremy Scahill On US & Israel Attack Iran | HasanAbi Archive YouTube video by HasanAbi Archive

Jeremy Scahill is the only journalist who I’m positive hasn’t lied to me for 25 years. Always listen to him.

youtu.be/t-5fGGhva0c?...

Picture of Marjane Satrapi alongside a quote from her. The quote reads: The world is not divided into countries. The world is not divided between East and West. You are American, I am Iranian, we don't know each other, but we talk together and we understand each other perfectly. The difference between you and your government is much bigger than the difference between you and me. And the difference between me and my government is much bigger than the difference between me and you. And our governments are very much the same... - Marjane Satrapi, Iranian-French graphic novelist

Thinking about this quote from Persepolis creator Marjane Satrapi again.

Dick Cheney’s preferred candidate wouldn’t have started a war in the Middle East.

Heard the unbiased legitimate down the middle mainstream news call a 13 year old child victim of a global pedophile ring a “young woman” for the one hundredth day in a row tonight.

Stacey King deserves so much better man. He and Adam Amin are the best broadcasting team in the league and they have to watch this shit year after year. It’d be like the city of Chicago strapping Roger Ebert to a chair and making him watch Porky’s every day.

I often think about the fact that if the FBI et al had not killed Fred Hampton, he would be 78 today. Younger than Jesse Jackson was. Must have felt strange to outlive many of your contemporaries by decades.

"This is the Epstein class in all its glory. It’s an elite that schemes to remain as unaccountable for sexual crimes as it does for corporate crimes. It has its own hierarchy of friends and foes, and it will defend those friends no matter what they do, while the spoils of privilege flow."

RIP Jesse Jackson. He saw y’all promising your vote to Gavin Newsom two and half years from now and was like I’m out

I find some hope knowing somewhere in this vast country there’s an all female hardcore band forming right now called Bondi’s Burn Book