“fuck this could change everything. i need to tell my girls about this”

-an ant after it smells a little Captain Crunch on the floor

yeah, they should’ve had Ray Charles up there!!! why didn’t they get Ray Charles????

me at 4yo trying to gather my entire extended family to watch me do a little flip or something

mahomes looks like a haunted porcelain doll

omg Kelce looks like he’s having Vietnam flashbacks

it’s so heartening to see the US finally engaging in a trade war with our two greatest enemies, Mexico and Canada

😔

Okay wait SHE just farted??? Miss thing is playing 4d chess

gonna conjure one up

ooooh this lady sitting in my row on this flight has a BAD attitude. Mean for no reason. I don’t have to fart rn but im gonna figure something out before we land

I hate when a candle is hard to blow out like what the hell are you trying to prove

Thank you ❤️

so happy it’s finally out :) I was the one holding the flashlight under Trump’s face for this portrait :) it smelled really bad down there but i think i did a really good job and i hope they eventually pay me ❤️

What was ur most embarrassing moment of 2024 (not gonna share mine but would like to hear urs)

i’m old enough to remember when Kim Kardashian said she was going to law school

“don’t forget to leave milk and cookies out for Santa tonight 😄😝”

Damn, I can tell from your Guy Fawkes profile pic that you really have a handle on the zeitgeist

“who are they?? they don’t even fucking go here!!”

—me after seeing a herd of African buffalo stampeding through the frigid central Asian steppe in Kraven (2024)

I truly cannot impart to you how jarring it was. It was like seeing zebras in the alps

Kraven (2024) is a trailblazing film. No other movie has so bravely depicted thousands of African buffalo living in Eastern Russia. Do they explain this? No. But that’s part of the bravery.

luigi they would hate to see two italianx men get coffee together

mama mia i would like to join the manhunt as well

wow so now folks want to hurt u for simply telling people they are too poor to survive cancer? woke culture has gone to far

they are caused by being tacky

can’t stand seeing one of my friends get a nosebleed. like what are u doing?? grow up

Australians

Good morning to those of you who are awake. Nurses, ghouls, raccoons, etc

without what and a drink