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Posts by E. E. Eugene

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Leaked Konami Documents Reveal "The Heart of the Cards" To Be An Actual Human Heart | Commander's Herald Tokyo, Japan — Internal Konami documents recently leaked to us from an anonymous whistleblower reveal shocking news about the media company’s inner workings and future plans. They range from video gam...

Konami apparently had plans to release a life-sized plastic replica of the heart for $300 USD, to be packaged with a random assortment of card packs valued to be around $9.50 usd. Whether it conveyed magical powers was left vague in the fax.

4 days ago 21 12 1 0
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Arcades, the Strategist Files Lawsuit Against Ozempic | Commander's Herald COPENHAGEN — Novo Nordisk, the pharmaceutical company that produces Ozempic, has been sued by the elder dragon . The Dragon claims that the company has significantly reduced the base toughness of many...

"I do one thing: turn big juicy asses into big juicy card draw and damage. That doesn’t work when every defender from Dominaria to Duskmourn is suddenly a 2/1. This Ozempic crap has single-handedly ruined my whole schtick.”

1 week ago 25 15 0 1

we're going LIVE SOON DAWG

1 week ago 44 15 0 0
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The campaign for the Loose Ends anthology ends on Thursday! ⏲️ Back now to reserve your copy of this stunning collection of short comics about resolutions before it's too late.

Find it at kickstarter.oneshipress.com!

#looseendsanthology #endingsoon #indiecomics

2 weeks ago 8 7 1 1
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Oracle Chair Larry Ellison Exiles 30,000 Employees to Cast Treasure Cruise | Commander's Herald REDWOOD SHORES, CA — In a sudden move that sent shockwaves through the industry, Oracle Chairman Larry Ellison announced he was exiling the careers of 30,000 of the company’s employees, and paying 1 b...

“We can’t let Sam Altman have a better board state than us, our investors watching the game play out would start to think we’re losing. And if they think we’re losers, they won’t watch my television networks or use my software."

2 weeks ago 32 9 0 0
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Dozens Injured As Ms Bumbleflower's Easter Egg Hunt Takes Brutal Turn | Commander's Herald Chaos erupted at the first annual Bumbleflower Easter Egg Hunt when word got out that there were not enough prizes for everyone who entered. Attendees were initially lured in with promises of drawing ...

BREAKING - Eggs

Happy Easter, everyone. From all of us at Commander's Herald, thanks for surviving with us. Hope the laughter helps.

commandersherald.com/dozens-injur...

2 weeks ago 84 27 4 1
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this isn't a CH thing i just really wanted to make this image

2 weeks ago 223 40 1 3
Cube QR Code
Commander Sealed logo
Trans lifeline logo
Command Zoe Logo
Donation QR Code
Girls Night Cube: A Fundraiser
Saturday, April 11th
@commandzoe
@bugsmaytrix
@kathleen.loadingreadyrun.com
youtube.com/@deaddomain
@defiantmartyr
@monicamillions
@jdragsky
@golgarigalsplashes

Cube QR Code Commander Sealed logo Trans lifeline logo Command Zoe Logo Donation QR Code Girls Night Cube: A Fundraiser Saturday, April 11th @commandzoe @bugsmaytrix @kathleen.loadingreadyrun.com youtube.com/@deaddomain @defiantmartyr @monicamillions @jdragsky @golgarigalsplashes

7pm artist pod
@trash-artificer @finncapashen @golgarigalsplashes

9pm
Writer pod with chris kluwe
@chriswarcraft @bugmaytrix @pixelh3art

7pm artist pod @trash-artificer @finncapashen @golgarigalsplashes 9pm Writer pod with chris kluwe @chriswarcraft @bugmaytrix @pixelh3art

Trans Day of Visibility is also the day I started HRT. Today marks two years for me of making the choice that would visibly change my body forever.

I am excited to announce my first Trans Lifeline fundraiser
Day 1: Girls Night Cube
Day 2: Commander Double Header

Prizes for donations during stream!

3 weeks ago 481 133 5 15
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This band desperately needs a rhythm section.

2 weeks ago 0 0 0 0
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Why is Primo dog shaped but covered in sharp crystals? And also not prime number themed. The math wizards really fucked this one up.
I will build and love Primo despite these mistakes.

2 weeks ago 0 0 0 0
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Happy Trans Day of Visibility!

If you are looking for reading material and want to support trans/non binary creators. Check out the Ringo Award Winning, Transphoria:

lifelinecomics.com/products/tra...

3 weeks ago 239 117 2 1
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New Strixhaven Book Reveales Rest of Arcavios Full of Subhuman Creatures Called Townies | Commander's Herald A new book about the plane of Arcavios, which hosts Strixhaven Academy, is set to be released alongside Secrets of Strixhaven this April. Minutiae of Arcavios by Professor Fredrick Jackson Ghost-Turne...

“Townies live off the refuse of our esteemed institution. That’s why I don’t tip or make eye contact when they’re serving me drinks. I’m already the reason they have a purpose; they should be thanking me, not looking for handouts or special treatment.”

3 weeks ago 20 8 0 1

Ok I have to admit, as a Catch 22 fan, raising the age I could be drafted over 34 on my 34th birthday IS pretty funny.

4 weeks ago 1 0 0 0

None of our problems are solved with more ICE agents.

The last thing we need is ICE at airports terrorizing the traveling public. (1/2)

4 weeks ago 463 73 6 2
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Counterspell Remains in Chuck Schumer's Hand Uncast for 10th Consecutive Turn | Commander's Herald Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer is, according to an anonymous Senator with a pair of , currently holding a copy of in his hand, and yet is refusing to play it.  “He’s had it in his hand for the p...

“Unfortunately, in each of those cases, I did not have any open mana,” said Schumer, laying his elbow on the table to cover up his two untapped Islands, which had been gathering dust.

1 month ago 333 117 3 20
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"Centrist" Pramikon Player Only Attacks Left | Commander's Herald HENDERSON, NV — The Wednesday Night Commanders games at Flash Bazbo Comics usually run without controversy. “Everyone here is pretty chill, rule zero discussions tend to go smoothly, no issues,” the s...

"He chose not to attack a Miriam Vehicles deck once because he ‘once saw a homeless guy pee on that Subway Train’. A Ziatora player got attacked into because ‘Unions are robbing our economy blind’."

1 month ago 82 36 0 4
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There's never been a more important time to promote trans superhero comic books.

1 month ago 75 27 1 0

I'm gonna need April to make up for how shitty March had been.

1 month ago 0 0 0 0

Spending a week back in rural Ohio did me good. It's a reminder to appreciate everywhere that isn't rural Ohio.

1 month ago 0 0 0 0
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David Ellison Promises to Return Warner Bros. to Its Original 1923 Values | Commander's Herald HOLLYWOOD, CA – After a bidding war with Netflix, Paramount is poised to acquire legacy media giant Warner Bros. This would give the company a massive share of the entertainment industry, and many wor...

“We’re committed to respecting the legacy of Warner Bros. by upholding the values that created the legendary company. We at Paramount firmly believe in protecting those century-old morals. The exact values that created classic movies like The Jazz Singer.“

1 month ago 18 6 1 0

Both respectable answers.

1 month ago 1 0 0 0

I strongly believe that every lgs needs exactly one banding deck.

1 month ago 1 0 1 0

We love Willow in this house.

Those decks both seem really fun!

1 month ago 1 0 1 0

Oh shit I never thought about the attack curses with her. That's so fun!

1 month ago 1 0 1 0

Hell yeah.

1 month ago 1 0 1 0

Willow is a great pick.
Zur is a problematic fav of mine. I had him built for a while but pulled him apart because I felt bad about how long my turns took.

1 month ago 0 0 1 0
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Oh fuck is that a typo? Whatever, ship it - it's funnier that way,,,,

Commander's Herald Writers Starter Pack
go.bsky.app/63XWAC5

1 month ago 45 22 0 2

Hello to all the new followers from the CH starter pack. I appreciate you all ❤️

Now everyone tell me your favorite Buffy character and most played commander so I know if I need to block you.

1 month ago 2 0 4 0
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Dog starter! Dog starter! Dog starter!

1 month ago 0 0 0 0
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The World Is Collapsing So Let's Look at All The Cute Legendary Dogs | Commander's Herald With the world slipping towards a more fascist-friendly version of Mad Max, it can be hard to stay positive. Pop culture and cute animals aren’t enough to keep us from walking into the rising Oceans a...

commandersherald.com/the-world-is...

Pop culture and cute animals aren’t enough to keep us from walking into the rising oceans anymore, so we’re combining the two.

1 month ago 24 6 1 1