“Okay then. Put a fake moustache on yourself and call yourself

Cuckoo Caca”

Well, I’d say Ultragirl, but she unfortunately exists already. And she sucks.

But if you go with your hero name you can destroy lives and your own reputation. The most villainous act ever!

How about Supergirl?

“You know. If Supergirl was open about the time she had a boyfriend as a pet, she’d probably have a lot more guys lining up at her door.

…but probably because they had a very different idea by what she meant as a pet.”

A volleyball coach name Ella.

ITS APRIL FOOLS!

GASP

“Wait I mean, I knocked him out. With a giant glove.”

“I knocked up a guy once”

she just laughs

“Oh? Did I fluster Spider-Girl? Aren’t you supposed to be a confident, quip tossing hero?”

“So what you’re saying is you want to spend the night with someone who dresses like something that scares you?

…Wow. Flattering.”

“Nah. I don’t think I’m gonna leave. Might spend the night. I even made a bed put of books. I’ll be out by morning.”

“Yup! Based it on my…uh…based it on one I used to know. Or one I…think I knew.

Unfortunately multiversal travel, head traumas, and mental health problems sort of make memories of former lovers…hazy.

And I’m quite the artist, if I saw so myself. Detailed, yet…elegant. Except the one on page 69.”

“I suppose. I mean, it’s also breaking and entering. But I also helped out. I got all their VHS tapes and rewinded all of them.

….I can’t believe they still have VHS tapes. Of Reading Rainbow! It’s incredible!

Either way, I think that balances it out.”

“I’m a girl with clown based gadgets, mental health problems, and several wacky identities and I lived in a world with an evil version of the Justice League ruling with an iron fist.

I should not be alive. But…

…eh. Maybe that’s the funniest joke of all.”

“Nah. You see. I’ve done it specially on books written by authors with the name Richard.

It’s a pun.

Also, I got really bored.”

she held up a book

“Also this one autobiography of Lex Luthor. But that’s just because he is one.”

“In fact, sometimes I feel like I’m only alive because the Crime Syndicate found me…amusing.

You know, something funny to beat up to an inch of my life.

I mean, I’m sort of outclassed and realistically I should have died years ago.”

“Besides, where I come from? It’s not…not really a funny place. At all.”

“I got a lot of identities. The clown stuff is just iconic.”

“Maybe you haven’t met the right clown! I’m mostly harmless. Mostly. Clowns get a bad reputation. Probably because of the ones who go psychotic and murder.

Lucky for you, I’m only psychotic. I’m not murderous…well, not today.

……sometimes I dress up with a top hat and cane.”

“Vulgar? Oh. Do penises offend you? I mean, personally I’m a big fan. That’s why I’m drawing them on library books after hours.

And don’t change the subject! You got a clown problem? Are we not amusing to you?”

“You got a problem with clowns? I mean, this is just my main outfit. I have a lot of different disguises and identities…

…but clowns are more fun.”

“But you know what /IS/ hard?”

she has broken into a library and has been drawing penises on books for the last hour

“Having fun isn’t hard! When you got a library card!”

plays the trumpet obnoxiously loud

No no no. THIS is dicks home.

“What she’s not telling you, is five seconds after doing this, she falls off and her head goes through the wall.

She doesn’t remember this happening. On account of her head going through the wall.”

a pixel art of a baboon and a lion cub from the lion king ALT: a pixel art of a baboon and a lion cub from the lion king

“Bribing people with his adorableness? Awwwwwww…….

………………”

“Trying to see if I can start a fake rumour.”