Steamed Hams full transcript Well, Seymour, I made it- despite your directions. Ah. Superintendent Chalmers. Welcome. - I hope you're prepared for an unforgettable luncheon. - Yeah. Oh, egads! My roast is ruined. But what if I were to purchase fast food and disguise it as my own cooking? Delightfully devilish, Seymour. Ah- Skinner with his crazy explanations The superintendent's gonna need his medication When he hears Skinner's lame exaggerations There'll be trouble in town tonight Seymour! Superintendent, I was just- uh, just stretching my calves on the windowsill. Isometric exercise. Care to join me? Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour? Uh- Oh. That isn't smoke. It's steam. Steam from the steamed clams we're having. Mmm. Steamed clams. Whew. Superintendent, I hope you're ready for mouthwatering hamburgers. I thought we were having steamed clams. D'oh, no. I said steamed hams. That's what I call hamburgers. You call hamburgers steamed hams? Yes. It's a regional dialect. - Uh-huh. Uh, what region? - Uh, upstate New York. Really. Well, I'm from Utica, and I've never heard anyone use the phrase "steamed hams. " Oh, not in Utica. No. It's an Albany expression. I see. You know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger. Oh, no. Patented Skinner burgers. Old family recipe. - For steamed hams. - Yes. Yes. And you call them steamed hams despite the fact that they are obviously grilled. Ye- You know, the- One thing I should- - Excuse me for one second. - Of course. Well, that was wonderful. A good time was had by all. I'm pooped. Yes. I should be- Good Lord! What is happening in there? - Aurora borealis. - Uh- Aurora borealis at this time of year at this time of day in this part of the country localized entirely within your kitchen? - Yes. - May I see it? No. Seymour. ! The house is on fire. ! No, Mother. It's just the northern lights. Well, Seymour, you are an odd fellow but I must say you steam a good ham.

Today is officially the 30th anniversary of Steamed Hams. On April 14, 1996, "22 Short Films About Springfield" aired for the first time!

This is so well done. 👌

I Guess We're Just Waiting Around To See If This Demented Psychopath Kills Everyone | Defector There is a particular indignity that comes from living in America, derived from the experience of waking up in the morning to see reports that Donald Trump has said something profoundly evil, and then...

I guess we're just waiting around to see if this demented psychopath kills everyone: defector.com/i-guess-were...

Pete Hegseth Replaces Top General With Horse That Drinks Beer

Pete Hegseth Replaces Top General With Horse That Drinks Beer theonion.com/pete-hegseth-replaces-to...

My sons, Aryann and Grokulus, love to visit local establishments and shoot at the feet of service employees, causing them to "dance." Do you like this. Is this relatable

I'm hardly the first person to note this, but it's enormously instructive that our President and his followers saw the message "THE ONLY THING MORE POWERFUL THAN HATE IS LOVE" and understood it, correctly, as an attack on them

Jeff Bezos Changes Washington Post’s Slogan To ‘Love You, Babe’ After Getting Into Fight With Lauren Sánchez

Jeff Bezos Changes Washington Post’s Slogan To ‘Love You, Babe’ After Getting Into Fight With Lauren Sánchez theonion.com/jeff-bezos-changes-washi...

Early in his career, William Randolph Hearst famously joked that if his papers kept losing $1 million a year, he'd lose all his money in 60 years. If the Post continues to lose $100 million a year, it will take Jeff Bezos 2000 years to lose his money.

I think it's best for everyone to understand that the unified class project of billionaires right now is to do to white collar workers what globalization and neoliberalism did to blue collar workers.

All this news is really completely confirming all my unfair knee-jerk judgments about a certain cadre of rich/famous douchebags, I gotta say

1. From lung cancer to climate change, capitalist governments are notoriously slow to recognize and remedy the negative externalities generated by corporate activity.

Generative AI is no exception. Large language models are proving a disaster in numerous spheres of public life.

Revealing stat: prior to widespread gen-AI, arXiv rejected ~4% of submissions. Now it's 10–12%.

Stephen Miller Reminds Picky-Eater Son That There Starving Kids In Basement

Stephen Miller Reminds Picky-Eater Son That There Starving Kids In Basement theonion.com/stephen-miller-reminds-p...

Renfrew Christie Dies at 76; Sabotaged Racist Regime’s Nuclear Program

Holy hell, what an obituary

Apple Photos Reminds Man He Was Nude In Capitol Building 5 Years Ago

Apple Photos Reminds Man He Was Nude In Capitol Building 5 Years Ago

Please say “ethnic cleansing” when posting this stuff because that’s what they’re broadcasting. They’re broadcasting plans to engage in ethnic cleansing.

This is the funniest shit I have ever seen. He kicks the dude in the beans and then mocks him

I wouldn't be surprised if Erwin Schrödinger turned up in the Epstein files...

Boomerang.

Il noto giornalista Federico Rampini ha pubblicato un video estremamente dettagliato e ricco di informazioni (150 secondi), per parlare del presunto “scandalo di Nature”. 1/7

After $300B in investment, we have finally created a machine that can reproduce the conscious and unconscious biases of the 6th form to physics tenure pipeline.

My colleague James Millen asked AI to make the picture of his group at their Christmas dinner look like distinguished scientists. It made all the brown people white and all but one of the women men...

1 It does!

Montage du célèbre logo antifa avec un paquet de farine à la place des drapeaux et le texte "ANTIFA - RINE"

On n'oublie pas le jeune héro de Vesoul

Nicolas Sarkozy se fait greffer une troisième jambe pour accueillir tous ses bracelets électroniques Toute l'information selon des sources contradictoires.

Nicolas Sarkozy se fait greffer une troisième jambe pour accueillir tous ses bracelets électroniques www.legorafi.fr/2025/11/26/nicolas-sarko...

Today’s xkcd made me cry.

In a good way.

xkcd.com/3172/

A Euclidean fermion ;) I fear this comes from the "equation of love" nonsense

Researchers publish paper about the promise and perils of post-publication peer review (e.g. Pubpeer). Turns out the paper has several hallucinated citations, which are pointed out on... Pubpeer.

Commenters have also spotted that the last author (and EIC of the journal) has 11 retractions. 🤷‍♂️

Cat Follows Man Through Apartment Like Racist Walgreens Employee

Cat Follows Man Through Apartment Like Racist Walgreens Employee theonion.com/cat-follows-man-through-...

SW quarter of France this morning experienced Tmin of 17 to 23°C ! 😱

Yes, some 'tropical nights' in November! 🥵

This is far more than what we can normally expect during the afternoon mid-november in these regions... insane!

Map: @infoclimat

The Republican president is a pedophile who has doubled my healthcare costs and let scores of violent criminals out of jail. But a Democratic mayor-elect wants to make busses free in a city I don't live in. I have never felt more politically homeless.