Toxic environment i live in is so.
& also being around someone irl that i have as a friend for the first time in literal years.
It’s a lot to process.
& Its been an emotional time (not in a bad way, but yk)
I don’t feel like I’m just having to survive.
Just…
It really does highlight how abysmal things are at home, how bad the toxicity has gotten.
I actually feel like I can breathe where I’m at & just.
Find rest for once in my life.
…I know it’s going to suck when I have to fly back to texas on Saturday, but just
Being able to be away from the
…Its very telling how, as I’ve been here visiting a close friend these past few days, my headspace has been. Extremely quiet.
The extremes I’ve been in emotionally are near nonexistent, & there’s been so many other things that are just…
The visit so far has been a lot.
Not in a bad way, no, but…
Off we go
Time to depart from texas ✈️
I know there are a gazillion takes on the Aries New Moon we've had today.
I'm adding to the pile, if you're interested in yet another take!
I look at the lunation through the lens of the 12th Parts and the asteroid goddesses--you can read about it here: www.bodhimindful.com/blog/aries-n...
Cassini WAC Saturn Storm Obs (TBA) 2 - From Ian Regan - https://flic.kr/p/jRBw4H
God bsky only just now started working again for me
48 hours til flight
Job has me ready to give up.
They are so, SO desperate for people to resub. PLEASE don't resub your Nitro everyone. Props if you aren't already subbed, props if you were subbed and you unsub right now. NOTHING changes unless a company FEARS for their bottom line. Feel free to use Discord still, but don't give them a penny. 💖
“People need to be nicer to each other online” and “people need to develop thicker skin because it’s not normal or healthy to get upset at everything you don’t agree with” are two statements than can and should coexist actually
Only ppl i follow are allowed to reply to my posts & ik i didnt add some extra nonsense in replies here til now so 💀
Dysfunctional ass site
Why the fuck does it say this post has a reply
Saturn return going exact for me today.
…i think this cat whole ass only had one kitten.
& the way she guilts me too over expressions of wanting to go no contact or being unable to forgive makes me all the more bitter
The wuiet awareness of how much /angrier/ a person Ive become w my mom as well is just…
It stings but like i honestly to god cannot let her off the hook for the excuses she makes for our shared abuser (my dad) & how dismissive she is of his bs just because she thinks she can handle it.
On Active duty Military trying to infiltrate Vtubing
Do NOT trust them, don't work with em, don't promote em, don't allow em in your space, warn you friends, warn you community.
This is the USA gov gathering information on viewers/communities and spreading propaganda.
This is dangerous. Be aware
Whole leech of a person
If it weren’t for me letting myself be manipulated i woulda never left uni & i woulda never almost given up on my artwork—bc he legit would say neg things abt my hopes & ambitions as a creative to shut them down
& i woulda graduated by now if i hadn’t listened
Bitchass.
i specify giving me money for my future as a means to atone specifically because he is one of the main three reasons i dropped out of uni bc he manipulated me into believing it was the best thing to do, & i still regret letting him do that to this day
On top of how he made me feel like shit w my art
Fuck right outta here.
If you REALLY wanted to atone for your past bs & fucking help me you’d shut the fuck up & donate a shit ton of money to me to help me leave WITHOUT ANY FUCKING INVOLVEMENT WITH ME NOR CONTACT W ME
& not some “live w me 🥺” shit that i know could get me abused again.
Me moving TO A WHOLE ASS NEW STATE WHERE NO ONE I KNOW LIVES & being completely at his mercy in his place & that claim of “you wouldn’t have to pay anything here as a roommate” is bs bc i know eventually there’d be the expectation i pay up in some way
Esp w how extremely transactional he is
Nah.
Pisses me tf off.
Because I see through it, & it angers me bc its like the only fucking reason you want to help me that way is bc you’d have access to me again & i cannot trust that you wouldn’t abuse your power over me if i just fucking stupidly accepted that dogshit ass offer bc that would mean
This email i got from my abusive ex talking abt “i can help you out of your financial dilemma 🥺 why dont you come here stay with me for some time to recover from your job & i pay you an allowance & you dont even gotta do anything until its time for yiu to leave & i’ll help you w your goals 🥺” still
Coming back to this in a bit bc im still thinking a bit abt it
Dreams were very strange last night.
Mirror tool often to ensure I’m constantly catching anatomical errors & that had helped me w continuously improving too, & unless I can find something irl that I can use for my traditional process its going to be difficult
The best I got rn is my phone which 💀 yeah LMAO
I think if it comes down to it I might have to change a good portion of my process altogether…
I’m not sure???
It’d probably mean having to do all my sketchwork on traditional & then the rest digitally, which I’m not sure how to feel about & if its feasible or not, esp bc for me I make use of the
