congrats!

I don't block anyone online because I'm afraid they might come see me in person.

I think the TV ending was the real ending and now he can't think of an alternate ending that doesn't enrage his readers.

"Let's circle back to that one" is my go to.

i’m such a tradwife that i can’t climax unless i’m fantasizing about churning butter

I wonder if the brain worms feel good, like a little massage inside your head

I’ll never forget the time the great @minakimes.bsky.social made a video to prove to bsky that she’s not a bot.

Lockpicking is the gateway drug to becoming a Magician.

called the mcdonald’s cashier a boor after they refused to let me drink the french fry grease

Burning some mixtape CDs so we can have something to do when Bsky goes down again.

If Bluesky goes down on me again, I'll have to marry it.

and at a good price I'm sure.

big sad I can no longer get waterproof wool shoes though.

hell yea one of my favorite night markets of the motherland.

Weirdo reply guy reporting for duty 🫡

What do you call cheese that gossips?

Chatter Cheese

I think Gary's in good hands

He's thriving

Siri why is my baby still bald

standing naked in front of the fridge because you cant afford aircon is called bare conditioning

Me Flirting: That tunnel looks wet and moist.

Them: Sir, this is a carwash, please roll up your windows and put your car in neutral.

sorry Ashley made me.

what? It's better than the other one I was thinking about posting.

What's the difference between a well dressed unicyclist and an under dressed bicyclist?

Attire.

Go hard or go home. - Beave edition.

time will heal. maybe not 100% but enough so we can function. and you can fill whatever time doesn't heal w/ bsky. yay?

I would like to upgrade my gravy boat to a gravy warship.

I'm more of a Universal Waste myself.

the only fintech i care about is equipping orca whales with saw blades

I'll be watching the news in case you save another life randomly again.

going up to random strangers asking "are you Morty from Bsky??"