it’s a great day for transphobes to eat shit

But shall this crazed old man be tamely suffered to drag a whole ship’s company down to doom with him?

Strait of Hormuz map with the Human Centipede pasted over the top of the southern peninsula

Can this be a solution?

That’s awesome! Congratulations!!!

murderers still sailed on

oh good i was worried it was white supremacy and capitalism

A More Realistic AWP Schedule 8:00 AM to 5:30 PM - Daily Meditation Room For People Who Have Been Submitting to the New Yorker and Poetry for Years Without an Acceptance 9:00 AM...

0:30 AM to 11:45 AM:

- Dickinson and Drambuie: Pairing Your Favorite Writers with Liquor

- The Stegner: What an $85 Application Fee Didn’t Get Me

- A Year of Institutional Thinking: How to Unnecessarily Burden Your Students with Residual Academic Monotony

www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/a-m...

Lovely to meet you too! I’m still dazzled.

The outfit was on point. 👌

[Exit Murderer.]

Markwayne Mullin looks and sounds like some backwoods ding-dong that Raylan Givens has to throw in his car trunk on JUSTIFIED

Donate Your Miles — Stand With Minnesota Donate your Delta Skymiles to get people home from Texas

DID YOU KNOW?

If you have Delta Sky Miles, you can donate them to help a kidnapped-and-released person fly home!

They are set free on the streets of El Paso or another Texas town with no phone, no money, nothing at all. Your miles can get them back to their loved ones!

Order your Faves on my Digital Cookie Site Today That's right! You can order your favorite Girl Scout Cookies from me online, all while helping my troop and I do great things in our community and beyond! Check it out.

If you’ve been thinking to yourself “man, I really want to help people in Minneapolis, but I also some some cookies, AND I’d also like to help out trans, neurodiverse, and BIPOC youth“ boy oh boy do I have some good news for you!

digitalcookie.girlscouts.org/scout/troop5...

ICE is now responsible for 66% of the homicides in Minneapolis this year.

Literally a publication for eight-year olds 40 years ago

Uni lad headline hospice nurse who’s seen 100s of people die says everyone always says the same thing on their deathbed. Photo is a blond haired blue eyed woman’s face

“you won’t get away with this”

oh no

Congrats!

Three panel cartoon by Tina Menzel A cat sitting on a table next to a big sign that says 2025 Cat looks down at 2025 Cat pushes 2025 off the table

visual representation of “we have added AI”

Woo hoo! I published only one humor piece this year, and I’m pleased as punch that it cracked McSweeney’s top 25.

Pantone just updated their Color Of The Year

The opening of Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho (1960): a black and white panorama of Phoenix, Arizona with the words "FRIDAY, DECEMBER THE ELEVENTH" printed across it in white.

Happy Psycho Day to all who celebrate.
(not yet Friday, but near enough)

I love a prestige true crime limited series, but I'm tired of watching bad things happen to Patricia Arquette.

When It Happens It’s been so long, you sometimes forget that eventually, IT will HAPPEN. It’s impossible to say when IT will HAPPEN. But it can’t be too long until...

"Of course, it doesn’t feel right to want IT to HAPPEN. And it’s obviously not okay to try to make IT HAPPEN. That’s not what this is ABOUT, just to make things CLEAR LEGALLY as far as VARIOUS AGENCIES are concerned."
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/whe...

Elon got Joyce Carol Owned

This is so good.

I heard there was a secret mash
That turned into a graveyard smash
But you don't really care for monsters, do you?

Can’t decide what to buy on Prime Day?

Try: absolutely nothing, and then go support indie bookstores instead 📚