After learning that ships go both ways in the Strait of Hormuz, Trump started calling it the Bi of Hormuz and now he and conservatives are blocking it.

You know what... I'm looking for a job and a place where I can play games and where I can get a job where playing the same games would keep me from getting a job.

*LinkedIn*

@jessicabriedl.bsky.social I was so happy to hear you (again) on Freakonomics Radio.

This is a cartoon. In the first panel, Jesus is in front of the tomb with the stone rolled back, saying "I am risen." The second panel shows Jesus crossing his arms because he is cold and he says "brrrrrrrr." In the 3rd panel he has gone back inside the tomb rolling the stone in front of the opening. The artist is holyjuan. The date is April 8th, 2007

Oldie but still true. #ohio #jesus

NOON GOD!
THEY BLAME YOU?!
DAMN THEM!
DAMN THEM TO HELL!
YOU SAVE THEM FROM DROWNING AND THEY PULL YOU UNDER.
YOU FALL ON THE GRENADE AND THEY STAND ON YOUR BACK.
WE DO NOT DESERVE YOU.

Don't come at me with a sentence that ends in two question marks unless you want me to escalate with a semicolon.

Stand-up comedian diagnosed with terminal cancer travels thousands of miles to try to kill his ex-wife, then dies a day later in the woods. Ba-da-dum.

I'm 100% sure that a meteor has never been found on the Earth's surface.

NOON GOD IS IN ALL PLACES IN ALL TIMES: PRESENT, PAST AND FUTURE.

NOON GOD!
FOOLS! IDIOTS!
THEY QUESTION YOUR VOICE?
THEY APPEAR FROM UNDER THEIR ROCKS WITH PHONES IN HAND, SLACK JAWED AND DOUBTING.
THEY WILL NEVER LEARN.
MY FAITH WAIVERS, NOT IN YOU, BUT IN US.
NOON GOD IS SILENT.

Trump keeps asking where his War remote control is so that he can turn the channel to Cuba.

Amazon's "cancel your video subscription" site is down, probably because two million people are trying to cancel at once. It's not worth the new $5 price tag .

- worst team gets to pick from a random 66% of that pool which includes only A and B players
- best team gets to pick from randomly selected 33% with equal chance of A B and C.
- teams in between get other combinations of % of total recruits and ratio of A B and C players

I am a genus.

The NBA draft should be made up of completely picking from a random pool of players.
For example:
- all teams determine 100 top recruits
- all recruits are graded A, B, C.
- PICK ORDER IS RANDOMIZED

NOON GOD!
WE LACK FAITH.
WE ARE UNWORTHY.
BUT YOUR SILENCE WILL BE DEAFENING!
YOUR FAITHFUL WILL HEAR YOUR QUIETUDE AND WORSHIP.
THE OTHERS WILL QUESTION YOUR GODLINESS.
THEY ARE FOOLS!
WE AWAIT.

If we do a regime change in Cuba for them killing people in a boat, can we get it done for other administrations that have done the same thing?

What the hell am I going to wear when it gets too warm for my quarter zip pullovers?

Don’t you also love people who misuse “apart” and “a part”? Like when they say “I love being apart of this team!”

I'm getting to the age where I don't care enough about new things to remember them, I'm forgetting all the things I already knew, and anything I do think I remember is suspect.

When the words "a" and "part" are together, they mean separate, but when they are separate, they mean together.

NOON GOD!
WE WERE OBEDIENT WHEN BURIED IN SNOW.
WE BEGGED FOR YOUR HEALING AND COMFORTING SIREN.
NOW THE SUN SHINES.
NOW THE SNOW MELTS.
AND WE BECOME COMPLACENT.
DO WE NEED TO BE TAUGHT ANOTHER LESSON?
FOOLS!
NOON GOD IS SILENT.

The Seattle Seahawks are now one of only seven teams to have exactly two more Superbowl wins than the Cleveland Browns.

I want to hear the phrase, "Downright balmy," at least five times today.

We need a Twilight Zone episode where people wake up and have become their Al cartoon portraits.

Good News: It's going to get warmer!
Bad News: The Earth is plummeting into the sun
Ohioans: Fuck yeah!

Ohio, all we need to do is stay in our homes for 14 days and all this will be over.

The groundhog saw his shadow, they just didn't have the heart to tell us.

Welcome to Second January!

photo of Text that says Trump explains that representative ilhan Omar probably paid someone to squirt liquid on her because that's how he gets it done.

NOON GOD!
PREPARE US FOR THE DOOM THAT IS AND THE DOOM THAT COMES.
WE NEED YOUR GUIDANCE.
BUT WE NEED TO GUIDE OURSELVES.
WE FAIL.