A bottle of bleach. Perfect for forgetting a peer in his pants.

I'm not going to repost the picture of Lord Mandelson.
I am going to share a picture of the bottle of bleach I'm going to drink to try and forget the picture of Lord Mandelson.

Every news bulletin atm

This is who runs this account.

Ok, let’s do this🙄

We’ll start with an explainer covering:

🕒What is a 15-minute city
🏫What on Earth is going on with Oxford
👽Where the conspiracy theories have come from

And then we’ll look at the Telegraph article

🧵
1/25

I guess the big question is; who's going to have to give their Oscar to Melania Trump?

It's not going away.

Board of Peace - Season 1

Peter Serafinowicz on X stating "I genuinely dread the day I hear the news that Donald Trump has died, because I am going to cum so hard and I might be in like Tesco's"

A reminder of why Peter Serafinowicz is wonderful.

This line graph illustrates the percentage change in agency staff levels from the previous year for nine major U.S. federal scientific and health organizations between the fiscal years 2016 and 2025. The agencies tracked include the CDC, Department of Energy, EPA, FDA, NASA, NIH, NIST, NOAA, and NSF. For the majority of the timeline between 2016 and 2023, the agencies show relatively stable fluctuations, generally staying within a range of +5% to -5% change per year. However, there is a dramatic and uniform plummet starting in the 2024–25 period. Every agency depicted shows a sharp downward trajectory, with staffing losses ranging from approximately -15% to over -25%. The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) shows the most significant decline, dropping to roughly -26%, while the National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST) shows the least severe but still substantial drop at approximately -15%.

This is the most astonishing graph of what the Trump regime has done to US science. They have destroyed the federal science workforce across the board. The negative impacts on Americans will be felt for generations, and the US might never be the same again.

www.nature.com/immersive/d4...

If Trump was really worried about the Chagos Islands plan there would have been more than one post.

It was trolling.

#R4Today

If we had listened to voters over smoking we'd never have had smoking bans. It saved lot of lives and made places better for the vast majority.
Driving and speed limits are similar.
We need to do what's needed to make streets safer, not pander to a noisy minority.

A joke for the history buffs.

Michael Parkinson and Emu on the brink of hostilities.

"I no longer feel an obligation to think purely of Peace"

For a laugh, if I were either the Prime Minster of Denmark or Greenland, I would suggest offering Greenland to the US in exchange for a complete unredacted set of the #epsteinfiles.

I remember it vividly...

TERRY WANTS TO KNOW…

What are YOUR memories of seeing The Phantom Menace for the first time in 1999? We’d love to hear from you for our next episode.

Please RT.

(Thank you)

A front cover of a copy of Private Eye from March 2011 regarding the Andrew formally known as Prince, his family and Epstein.

A friend on bookface posted this picture of a copy of Private Eye he found when having a spring clean...

Indiana Jones in the Last Crusade. Trying to take back a cross that clearly belongs to Donald Trump.

"That belongs in a presentation to Donald Trump"

Trump with a straight face: Denmark can't claim Greenland just because "they had a boat land there 500 years ago"

I bet that in the parallel dimension where the #epsteinfiles have been released unredacted, I still have a dilapidated shed that I need to empty out, take down and replace before it falls down. Oh well, I'd still be prepared to pay the price.

Entering conference call...

Nadim Zahawi arrived in the UK from Iraq as a child refugee. His family claimed asylum once they were here. Today he has joined Reform who will stop all in country asylum applications. Under his new party, his own family fleeing persecution would be immediately deported.

Ah...a packet of Ritz Crackers counts as 'one portion', it would appear.

If a Pakistani Muslim owned X, distributed indecent images of girls on a platform where govt do their PR, where some receive payments for posts, they would have distanced themselves by now. X would be shutdown and Braverman and Farage would be calling for a ban and investigation into Pakistani men.

person in white shirt talking to police Driver Perfectly Describes Pedestrian They Couldn't See.

Driver Perfectly Describes Pedestrian They Couldn't See.

I deleted my X/Twitter account a considerable time ago. I had no idea just how glad I'd be with that decision until now.

Prayer for Uninteresting Times   Send me a slow news day, a quiet, subdued day, in which nothing much happens of note, save for the passing of time, the consumption of wine, and a re-run of Murder, She Wrote. Grant me a no news day, a spare-me-your-views day, in which nothing much happens at all, except a few hours together some regional weather, a day we can barely recall. Brian Bilston

This, please.