Me, watching my kid learn how to skateboard: “I should try picking this up.”

Also me:

Interesting that the war can end every day and the next day the war is still happening

Pope: [moral critique of illegal war]

President: I am Jesus. Thr pope is gay

Media: they are feuding😳

Here’s a little project I’ve been working on. ⚽️🐦‍⬛⚡️🤩

Lightning strikes on Thursday ⚡

It’s profoundly ignorant to suggest that the Pope should be fighting crime on behalf of the Catholic Church. Anyone who was remotely familiar with Roman Catholicism would know that that’s what Daredevil is for

Hum - Stars (3:51)

Orbán is basically a complete and total piece of shit, and even he can accept an election loss. It really makes Trump a uniquely garbage human being that he can’t admit he lost to Biden in 2020.

wait why are they climbing back into the capsule
come back

Melania: I never cut child in half with sword. I never do this.

The entire USA: what?

Melania: not me.

The 28th Virginia battle flag is a Confederate battle flag that belonged to the 28th Virginia Infantry Regiment. Captured by the 1st Minnesota Infantry Regiment at the Battle of Gettysburg, the flag was brought to Minnesota and exhibited at the state's capitol for several years before passing into the permanent collection of the Minnesota Historical Society after 1896 where it has remained since.

Happy Confederate Surrender Day from Minnesota where we still have your goddamn flag and we’re not giving it up.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/28th_Vi...

"Surely Minnesotans won't fight back," racists in 1863 and 2026

I understand why people are losing faith in electoral politics but one thing I think people forget is that voting fucking rules. Getting that big piece of paper (so long!), filling in those little bubbles, feeding the hungry machine and watching the number go up. Free sticker!

I am fully disgusted with them redoing Harry Potter on a creative level and a personal one. They are like our favorite network otherwise. I wish there was some non cancellation way to express displeasure other than just not watching Harry Potter ever.

The universe has been pulling me back to baseball lately and I’m so open to it

This one sealed the deal for me

based on my experiences as a parent i genuinely believe that if someone is feeling irritable the first thing they should ask themselves is “have i pooped today?”

Earlier today, Trump made it clear there's so much money in DHS' Big Ugly Bill slush fund that he wants to use it to pay TSA agents. That means the regime could have resumed TSA funding all along. Trump just wanted chaos in airports to pressure Congress into giving more money to his secret police. 🧵

This is true for a lot of MLS teams *cough* MNUFC *cough* but the marketing machine keeps them rolling right along

Other nations danced for joy at the World Baseball Classic. Team USA played toy soldiers Venezuela played with heart, Italy sipped espresso and the Dominicans showed off their verve at the tournament. America wanted to concentrate on war

After a fortnight that beautifully celebrated baseball, "one memorable image will be of Venezuela in the sunburst of joy. Another will be that of America alone, the hosts masquerading as toy soldiers, at home and painfully out of place."

Excellent Howard Bryant piece in @us.theguardian.com today:

Team USA (Olympics): we’re wearing Ralph Lauren

Team USA (baseball): gRaPhiC deSiGn is OuR paSion [backwards flag marching into combat]

Thinking about what I'd do if I quit my job and settled on "Low stakes Punisher" where I take on villains who are rude to service workers, who don't pick up after their dogs. That kind of thing. Our country is going to hell and I will fix it one asshole at a time

Spurs are SO bad they're making me feel bad for a Spurs player

There is a man at the ACC tournament screaming Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls while Stanford tries to shoot free throws

Idk Lindsey, ask Minnesota

An underrated path to self-improvement is to get with somebody who has an unrealistically high opinion of you and to fight every day to not disappoint them

The thing about Kash Patel flying to Milan to party with the U.S. men’s hockey team on a private jet paid for with taxpayer dollars is that he’s protecting billionaire pedophiles like Donald Trump and Elon Musk in the Epstein files.

new Strip Law clip where we thoughtfully and respectfully grapple with the legacy of one of the titans of animation that came before us

“STOP SMOKING AIDS”

Have to agree with Costco here