“Woke up today without polio, diphtheria, tetanus, pertussis, measles, mumps, rubella, hepatitis B, or Shingles.”

Thank you vaccines!

NOM!

Connecticut Just Told Masked ICE Agents to Show Their Faces SB00397 bars masks on every officer in the state, forces feds to show badges, and opens state courts to sue them. A first in the country.

No law enforcement officer operating in Connecticut—federal, state, or local—can wear a mask on duty. ICE and CBP agents have to show their faces and badges. And when an officer assaults someone recording them, commits false imprisonment, false arrest, or malicious prosecution, they lose immunity.

The Epstein Files were supposed to be released 123 days ago.

That's what the lightbulb said! I'm not a lightbulb…☹️

What's this K', Pop! Reamin' Hunters thing?!

Wonderful!

a man with long black hair and a beard is making a funny face . ALT: a man with long black hair and a beard is making a funny face .

The heart is large, but it has a tIn tIQ

Not one, the actual library. Where kids couldn't be bullied 🥹

Support these data centers: SCHOOLS, LIBRARIES, BOOKSTORES

Happy National Library Week! 💙📚

While this is so, and tragic, invisible lesbians will not be licked!✊

Daddy's haiku are
shittier than dogshit
Spock!

The ball gag is very uncomrtable on my testicles.

But they will speak, by god!

They will speak!

Behold the Kitening! Be sure to get its good side!

Roulette is a lovely name for a girl

They go through a stargate and get stranded. 28 days later the planet is overrun with teletubbies who hate Dr Rush

a man is standing in a field with a bunch of stuffed animals flying in the air ALT: a man is standing in a field with a bunch of stuffed animals flying in the air

Run with us!

No need, with as much as he eats🎱💩

Tr!mp thinks he's fantastic because Iran's boombastic!
But all along he's a-wrong because he's shit-tastic! Don't light a matchstick!
Boom!

I've been impressed by many people. They must stop. The indentations hurt.

crudité!

Me, too. (I just started a movement!)🤪

If you steal it back from the guy to whom you gave it, you become Robin Hood. He was rich, after all, and your were poor, so the theft is righteous.

Instructions:

In order to pacify through surprise and confusion, use one's mouth for the application of the condom.

If one is fortunate, the soldier, or officer, will not experience enough of startlement to pull the trigger of his weapon.

Otherwise, one will have no further concerns.

Hell, when I'm in love I'm too upsidedown not to talk about her. Maybe, as we see from other posts here, it's not all bad?

I thought you typed "weed stain" and my brain jumped to The Weedenstain Bears".

And, well, help!, I guess…

🎵Tart Caroline: Not bit-ter!

I was thinking about hot dogs…it meant I needed to bring my dog inside🤪

tortion😱