Sometimes I like to turn motion smoothing so I can pretend like I'm watching an extended cut scene from a video game.

If this Olympics opening ceremony is truly about unity, then show full penetration you cowards!

Another way Pokerface is following in Columbo's footsteps is that, like Peter Falk, Natasha Lyonne is hiring a bunch of her friends to work with her and I'm here for it.

The amount of money this government spends on the military is outrageous. The IMF must spend millions of American taxpayer money on self-destructing tech alone.

My four favorite words to hear upon entering a theater: "ninety minutes, no intermission"

Married life is just taking turns making jokes that you have to explain to each other.

Drinking too much? Too fast? How did you stop?

Has anyone actually gotten hiccups from drinking? Please let me know. For science.

Reacher is even more upside-down triangle than Superman

A parody side by side comparison of TV's Reacher and an average man which is an obviously altered image that is comparing Barbie's body to an average woman's body.

I downloaded Canva on vacation at midnight to make this because once inspiration strikes, you have to listen to it.

Adam Sandler's "The Cobbler" is a biopic about Daniel Day Lewis, a shoemaker who can magically step into other people's shoes and transform into them.

It is in our household!

Actually, it should be called "Dave and the Chipmunks"

What can I say, I'm into culture.

Jk Kendrick, don't come after me please.

"You're A Mean One, Mr Grinch" is the ultimate diss track. Kendrick wishes.

The production designers of the movie Hot Frosty really concentrated on the nipples of that snowman.

Maybe not the best idea to have Idina Menzel singing a song about her great escape on the Bronx Zoo float. Or maybe yes?

Respect to all the actors singing live in the cold rain during the parade right now

All Mystery Film streaming category showing the films 5 Dolls for an August Moon, Great Expectations, and Haunting Sarah

Shout! Factory TV: Technically all movies are mysteries because you don't know what's gonna happen next!

You're right. I'm funny.

3 melons and a peach is a head, boobs and butt. The whole package.

Fruit to body part equations are hard.

1 melon = a head
2 melons = boobs
I don't think I'm ready to know what 3 melons is!

Needed to know what keywords to use for my gif search

"Actually, lady, your daughter is naming her kid after the doctor, not the monster. Common misconception."

The Angelshark of Music whose been giving private lessons to the chorus girl

Google search for "size 44 French to US" First search result is generated by AI and says "A size 44 in French women's clothing is a US size 2, 4, 6, 8, 10 or 12." which is an extremely unhelpful and inaccurate answer.

Google has started giving me search results generated by AI and it's frequently much less helpful.

Yelled at by @dankmccoy.bsky.social from the next room because he thought I was dancing around with excitement at the tamales he brought home for breakfast. Turns out it was an earthquake.

From context clues watching the TV show Moonlighting, I just realized "making whoopee" did not mean pooping like I originally thought.