The payoff on the Steven Seagal running gag made me laugh SO HARD

I have a screenplay I've been meaning to write forever that is, at bottom, a remake of Wishman's MY BROTHER'S WIFE. (I also have an idea for a remake of A SMELL OF HONEY, A SWALLOW OF BRINE, but that's a tougher nut.)

I've mentioned this before, but: I managed as a teenager to see MIRACLE MILE completely blind, and that was a sensation I've been chasing ever since. So... that one.

But also also: it's not like this has more or richer character beats than the remake, it just has terrific actors filling in the emotional gaps left by the screenplay (Winters and Albertson in particular are doing wonders).

I also enjoyed the remake for what it was, and I think Petersen deciding that the character stuff isn't working, let's jettison it and get to the disaster faster was the best decision that could have been made under the circumstances.

But also: yeah, the original is a solid bit of work!

Cinematrix No. 755: April 20, 2026 Can you name a Seth Rogen movie with a number in the title?

Meanwhile, I fucked up the title of a very early Harrelson comedy.

Vulture Cinematrix No. 755: Apr 20, 2026

I got 8/9 Correct
Score: 2337

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Play at:
vulture.com/vulturecinem...

famed industrial metal pioneers Ministry are advocating for better academic pay on here = this app has the juice

Watching THE POSEIDON ADVENTURE, and seeing this so soon after the misbegotten remake really points up the importance of smart casting. Because, as it turns out, there's not all that much more character development here than in the 2006 film that deliberately cut all that shit out.

It's not a great movie, but it's one of the 21st century's most notable Big Director Swings, the sort of untrammeled fiasco of ambition that almost never gets made these days and we're all poorer for it.

I'm smoking that GAS Batman

FOLKS, this week @boxofficegross.bsky.social is ROCKIN' THE SUBURBS: we grab the great @ugarles.bsky.social, on his 52 Week Pod Challenge, enlivening what is otherwise a real uninspiring entry in our project, the weak, sloppy animated satire OVER THE HEDGE.

podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/2...

A muscular man poses for the camera with his guns and while wearing a patriotic American, flag-adorned, tight fitting outfit.

I'm not really sure I see the difference between this and drag.

I'm the weird guy who splits the difference and only likes pre-Barker Blink.

No, don't, it's terrible

IDENTITY. Already wasn't enjoying its drippy sub-giallo attempts at suspense and misdirection... then the twist hits, and it's like, why should I care anymore about any of this?

Just saw Brass's THE HOWL and not sure what I was expecting, but it wasn't that. Like, the closest analogue I can think of is... Makavejev? From the guy who's mostly famous for being really into butts? I may have to check out his other early films.

As defined by a song that could have existed in the '90s and nowhere else, benefitting from conditions exclusive to its time... I think ya gotta go with "Pepper" by the Butthole Surfers.

A packet of pepper sauce that was simply billed as Super Spicy Sauce. It is quite spicy.

I used this sauce on my beef noodles and now I can see through time.

A black cat with a white chest and white paws, surveying all he sees.

A white calico cat with a black blotch on the right half of her face and light brown ears.

Two cats in front of a window. The orange tabby is on the left, posing as if in anticipation of a leap. The black cat on the right laying down is enjoying the sun, eyes closed.

A black void cat curled up with his fave buried in his paws.

Went to a cat cafe, saw some cats

Cinematrix No. 753: April 18, 2026 Can you name a Josh Hartnett movie with a one or two-word title?

Surprised at the high totals for a couple thoroughly forgotten films here.

Vulture Cinematrix No. 753: Apr 18, 2026

I got 9/9 Correct
Score: 2645

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Play at:
vulture.com/vulturecinem...

Best song off that album, nice

Whoa, what song got used?

Yeah, olive oil and cheese and pastries can make you a little fat. Yeah, sunshine gives you wrinkles and wine ruins your liver and spending money on pretty things eats up your savings. But unfortunately, I've decided to enjoy life anyways

Told my kid about the 6-7 chicken nuggets.

Response: "This is a disgrace to nuggie society"

I feel like it's a grower, and if I take another look at it a bit down the line it might vault up in my estimation.

Some DreamWorks shit, a pretty good video-game adaptation, a striking documentary and an inept vanity project I forgot to log a couple weeks ago.

(Not pictured: NU FACES OF DEATH, which was a walkout.)

Congratulations!!!

To be fair, he might understand it after all, seeing as how he is definitely the tyranny of evil men.

Not sure who needs to hear this, but there’s a pair of ICE agents parked near the IFC Center, across from where the McDonalds used to be. Connecticut plates on their car, playing with their phones.