They're mastur something!

We've lost 6/10 games against Brighton under BlueCo. We've conceded 22 goals in those games. We've given them around £300m for players, coaches, sporting directors...

We're ambling around getting battered week in week out, not looking like scoring and we've got "world champions" on our shirt. It's truly truly embarrassing

Played 10
Won 4
Lost 6

Scored 14
Conceded 22

£63m Cucurella
£115m Caicedo
£25m Sanchez
£60m Pedro
Buonanotte loan fee
£25m Potter
Whatever we gave them for Winstanley

What's our record against Brighton since BlueCunts came in and bought all their players, signed their manager and gave their sporting directors plumb jobs?

Cucurella and Enzo Fernandez think they can play for Barcelona and Real Madrid

We are so so bad 😂😂

Neto might be the most limited winger in the league

Spurs dominated these the other day. We need Spurs to be already down before we lose to them

He had 1.73 ppg across his PL career at Chelsea. That's 66 points a season - same as Lampard got in 19/20 with a transfer ban and academy players.

He couldn't beat Arsenal, Man City or Man Utd either and only beat Liverpool when they were hungover or in crisis.

Yeah, we were shit last season too. We've had back to back wallies appointed by bigger wallies to coach kids

Caleb Wiley
Marc Guiu
Jason Sancho (loan)
Tosin Adarabioyo
João Pedro
Jamie Gittens
Alejandro Garnacho
Estevao Willian
Jorrel Hato
Liam Delap
Dario Essugo
Mamadou Sarr
Kendry Paez
Facundo Buonanotte (loan)
Geovany Quenda
Denner
Dastan Satpaev
Emmanuel Emegha

Moises Caicedo
Romeo Lavia
Christopher Nkunku
Cole Palmer
Axel Disasi
Nicolas Jackson
Lesley Ugochukwu
Robert Sanchez
Djordje Petrovic
Angelo Gabriel
Diego Moreira
Pedro Neto
João Felix
Kiernan Dewsbury-Hall
Filip Jorgensen
Omari Kellyman
Mike Penders
Aaron Anselmino
Mathis Amougou
Renato Veiga

Enzo Fernandez
Wesley Fofana
Mykhaylo Mudryk
Marc Cucurella
Raheem Sterling
Kalidou Koulibaly
Benoit Badiashile
Noni Madueke
Malo Gusto
Carney Chukwuemeka
Cesare Casadei
Andrey Santos
Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang
David Datro Fofana
João Felix (loan)
Gabriel Slonina
Denis Zakaria (loan)

Anything that millions of us can tag along to?

😂 you've got to

I'm sticking with 2-0 for Tuesday

How bad are the wingers that have been signed under this ownership btw

Sterling
Mudryk
Madueke
Gittens
Neto
Garnacho
Sancho

Jheez

Rosenior seems a nice enough guy but so are a lot of corporate whoppers that talk in cliches to sound educated without having any idea what they're saying

With Potter I initially liked that he wasn't a moaning git but quickly realised he was just a personality vacuum.

Pochettino was Spurs and played Chilwell LW.

Maresca totally detestable.

I've been fairly disinterested in managers since Lampard got sacked the first time tbh, but at least he got replaced with a good manager. Ever since...wow

It's at the point now where I feel nothing. It's not the losing, it's the absolute gutting of any identity that I can relate to. Nothing to cling on to. It's the reality of powerful idiots that think they're geniuses - probably what it's like being American.

They're negotiating a pay rise for him

We'll send Acheampong the other way for £20m to make up for it

We did well to only lose 3-1 to Bayern

Palmer might try and leave but they'll make him stay one more season.

Someone will be stupid enough to buy one of Neto/Garnacho.

They'd like to sell Delap but will loan him and hope he does alright so they can sell him the season after.

They'll have to stick with Fofana because no one would pay half of what they bought him for.

They're never going to admit Sanchez is crap - he'll still start the season.

Lavia will be too injured to go anywhere and they'll still be clinging onto one time he dropped a shoulder.

Out
- Jorgensen (loan to Strasbourg)
- Chalobah
- Tosin
- Badiashile
- Fernandez
- Essugo (loan)
- Gittens (loan to Strasbourg)
- Garnacho/Neto to Arsenal
- Delap (loan)
- Guiu
- Jackson

Thinking about the most BlueCo possible summer:

In
- Trafford
- Barco
- Van Hecke
- William Gomes
(Already agreed)
- Quenda
- Emegha
- Penders (return from loan)

But it's obvious we're building one of the best teams in the world?