So if my math is right I became a grand uncle around the minute I achieved unc status

2025 America is aggressive lead poisoning combined with religious psychosis and there’s no way it ends well for anyone.

Machine translation of the list’s description: “Special friends from the SkyVersum of nice contemporaries, who unfortunately have the habit of putting you in bad company. List keeps you out of your body, if you subscribe with the right option:-)”

The last time people said the rapture was happening I was at a convention and on the final day I got up at closing ceremonies and said "I haven't had this much fun since the rapture the other day"

I'm pretty sure nobody knew what I was talking about, which spoke well of them.

Erhm reverse that

Fade that cross homie

She does so much cocaine

“This isn’t the America I know”

Natives: “Ehhhhhhh…ain’t it, tho…??

seeing another rash of voter blaming and i wonder how people reconcile this with all the times dem senators - in deep blue states, even - that people voted for and put into office decided to give unanimous consent to GOP shit so they could go on vacation. they voted 'correctly', and yet, get nothing

we have been screaming from the rooftops since American occupation began. we have been trying to help you see what we've experienced since "your great country's" founding.

the root is rotten. the constitution is rotten. the government is rotten.

we must remove the rot and start again.

everyone's finally realizing it's fascism and no one is elevating Native people's voices in the conversation

you are all literally DOOMED. it's a circle-jerk until you listen to us.

Not normal, understandable, but not good

Dune yer homework

the hiring of Olivia Nuzzi by Vanity Fair makes the new rules of media clear:

❌ lightly criticizing Charlie Kirk

✅ FaceTime fingerblasting with your story’s subject, RFK Jr.

It’s deader than Charlie

A lot of people are laughing at the president declaring Antifa a terrorist organization without considering how that empowers anyone protesting fascism to be dealt with and tried as members of terrorist organized crime.

Objective: Go a day without holding any anti-american sentiments

Obstacle: America

a man in a blue shirt says i 'm hopeless and awkward and desperate for love . Alt: a lesbian named chandler bing in a blue shirt says i 'm hopeless and awkward and desperate for love .

Marx failed to consider that

you'll never get fired for posting a robert redford quote

Underrated

The real reason to oppose age verification is what you are seeing right now, with the bloodlusted attacks on people insufficiently mourning a dead podcaster.

They went after porn and sex workers as the easiest way to justify creating a panopticon they'll use to murder people.

And it's bipartisan

I can’t believe the Phantom Thieves of Heart were gonna change Charlie Kirk’s heart but then 9/10 happened

Goro Akechi will figure it out

If your question begins with "Why aren't the democrats" or "Why haven't the democrats" or "Why don't the democrats" the answer is they are actively complicit in the horrors and their opposition to republicans is purely theatrical. they are owned by the same people and have been for at least 40 years

Homie those are synonyms

Those who learn from history are doomed to watch other people repeat it

Imagine saying “the normal reaction is fear and sadness” about someone who thinks *you* should be publicly executed on tv getting got

Charlie Kirk wanted Hank Green to be publicly executed on tv

nobody wrote this much defending Trump when he incited Jan 6

nobody wrote this much defending Pelosi when a guy tried to kill her

nobody wrote this much about Melissa Hortman when she was assassinated

all this, for Charlie fucking Kirk, huh? he's the hill to die on? fucking rubes