falling in love again feels so fucking sccaaaaaarrrryyyyy 👹🫠

a man in a suit and tie is sitting at a desk saying i mean ALT: a man in a suit and tie is sitting at a desk saying i mean

Honestly, it’s so funny that my 8 year old was like “why is HE president when we could’ve had a girl president?!!!”

I am quite literally going to crash out

I need to start using this account moreeeee

a woman in a plaid shirt says " thanks " with a yellow question mark ALT: a woman in a plaid shirt says " thanks " with a yellow question mark

the eye doctor: wow for someone who is blind in one eye you do really good eye makeup

me:

yesssss! accountabilibuddies 🥰

I can’t give any input, but I’m def going to check this program out!! If you want to hold each other accountable I’m so game for that 🥰

the kiddos sick on Christmas calls for Christmas movies and ALL the snuggles with mom 🥰

the cutest thing is my stepmom screenshotting any Snapchat i post 😂🥰

I’ve gotten so many goodies at work this week 🥰

passed all my classes!! 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

a bitch is tired but my hard work paid off. one more semester then I get my bachelors degree!!!!

The fact that people actually thought she’d announce anything last night is hilarious - girly pop is anything but stupid. She knows how to market something and drag it out - can’t do that the last night!

The “we want to hear your opinion but not actually do anything about it” cookie

What if I just want to tear up the dance floor 😆😆

It’s finals week 😅😅😅

Finally going to see Wicked tonight!

30 min in and im already crying at Moana 2 😩

my favorite dish to eat is my granny’s dressing 🤣

Bless this poor guys heart. I went on a few dates with this guy post-divorce before I started exclusively dating women and he STILL reaches out on a consistent basis. He’s so nice, and he knows I’m not interested, but I still feel bad 🥲

I cannot wait to deep clean on Friday when the kids are with their dad 🙌🏻

The stomach bug has hit our house 😢😢

Every ounce of me wanting to give my kids the best Christmas ever vanished after we just took the worst Christmas pictures known to man bc my 7 year old wanted to be the biggest jerk

Seriously 😤😂😂 at least our brains are broken together 👯‍♀️

I’m glad I’m not the only one 🫠

Nobody:

My OCD brain monster: but what if Hazel was on a rollercoaster and unbuckled herself and fell hundreds of feet to her death you’re a terrible mother and deserve jail time

Me: brain, my dude, it’s the middle of November and we’re nowhere near a theme park what is your deal? 😤

Could’ve been worse but I promise you that deer is having a much worse time 🙃🤣

We get these!
- Christmas Eve
- Christmas
- New Years Eve
- New Years Day
- Thanksgiving
- Good Friday
- Easter
- Labor Day
- Memorial Day
- 4th of July

I work in a hospital - we get 10 major holidays
Sick/Vacation/Holiday all comes out of the same PTO bank
You start out with 40 hours after 90 day period
Then we earn 7 hrs every pay period (80 hours)

a close up of a man 's face with a blurred background ALT: a close up of a man 's face with a blurred background

Finally went to the dentist and luckily it wasn’t as bad as I thought - however the dentist was like “wow you must be in a lot of pain by the looks of your X-ray” 😂😂
I was like “not really, it’s just more annoying than anything”
The dentist: