@fortunefeimster.bsky.social has done it again. Go see her new tour, you'll leave with cheeks sore from laughing.

I've never been a fan of big birthday celebrations, but this year, I planned a day full of some of my favorite things. I hiked, gardened, napped, watched women's soccer, had a cocktail out with my wife, then went to see Wanda Sykes. It was simply perfect.

Thank you @iamwandasykes.bsky.social for a hilarious night in Phoenix! It was a great way to spend my birthday #herekittykitty

Someone I love very much is now 4 months sober

Welp, there goes my plan to buy a car this year.

Hegseth has to go

The Trump Administration Accidentally Texted Me Its War Plans U.S. national-security leaders included me in a group chat about upcoming military strikes in Yemen. I didn’t think it could be real. Then the bombs started falling.

From an operational security perspective, this is the highest level of fuckup imaginable. These people cannot keep America safe.

There is no better meal than one I've prepared using food that I've grown. #garden

My 19 year old, who is in college with amazing grades, still manages to remind me that he's still a dumb teenager more often than I'd care to admit. #momlife

Another great night full of laughs courtesy of @kristinkey.bsky.social

Ann Wilson covering Led Zeppelin is, for me, the next best thing. Heart crushed it tonight. #heart #ledzeppelin

Knowing how to cook a delicious, scratch meal for your loved ones is so undervalued.

And super gross

Will you hold my gum?

It's a wonderful thing to return from vacation and go straight to the #garden to harvest for dinner

Do. Not. Attend.

Just read this graf. Share it with people you know who don’t pay attention to politics or news.

The rocking chairs under the trees, with the sun shining in from behind you, are always a delight when traveling through the Charlotte airport. There's not a more pleasant spot to take a load off.

It felt appropriate to spend my time and money here today

Hugging my kid for the first time since he left for university, and seeing how well he is doing, makes for a very happy me.

My first beets and brussels
#garden #phoenixgarden #zone9b

Vacations are wonderful. Packing is not.

Some of those who work forces...

Why does Carolyn always look like she just smelled poo? #thetraitorsus

🎯

I spent the day cleaning out and organizing my mother's garage. I felt like the therapist on Hoarders, talking her through getting rid of all the things.

Brandi Carlisle's music does not speak to me at all. There, I said it. #stillalesbian

KNOW YOUR RIGHTS IN CASE OF ICE: CONOCE TUS DERECHOS EN CASO DE ENCUENTRO CON ICE:

DO NOT OPEN YOUR DOOR. ICE cannot enter your home without a warrant signed by a judge. Tell the agents to show you the warrant by sliding it under the door. NO ABRAS TU PUERTA. ICE no puede entrar a tu casa sin una orden firmada por un juez. Diles a los agentes que te muestren la orden deslizándola debajo de la puerta.

ASK THEM TO LEAVE. If ICE doesn't have a warrant, tell them you do not consent for them to enter your home and ask them to leave. At work, ICE cannot enter employee-only areas without permission. 2 PÍDALES QUE SE VAYAN. Si ICE no tiene una orden judicial, diles que no das tu consentimiento para que entren a tu casa y pídeles que se vayan. En el trabajo, ICE no puede ingresar a áreas exclusivas para empleados sin permiso.

REMAIN SILENT. You have the right to remain silent. If the agents ask you questions, tell them, "I wish to remain silent." PERMANECE EN SILENCIO. Tienes derecho a permanecer en silencio. Si los agentes te hacen preguntas, diles: "Deseo permanecer en silencio".

It is perfectly legal to know your rights and to educate others about them, too.

EVERYONE in the United States, citizen or not, has rights. I will not allow this administration to intimidate us from helping you know about them.

Here’s our shareable guide ⬇️: (pt. 1/2)